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Thunder Snow steals America's hearts

Kentucky Derby proves mint-julips are terrible again.

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Thunder Snow steals America's hearts
CNN

Kentucky Derby is known as the fastest two minutes in all of sports. The rain and sloppy conditions made the 2017 race as unpredictable as any in recent memory leading up to the starting gun. However, for the fourth consecutive year, the odds on favorite won the "Run for the Roses."

Congratulations to Always Dreaming, owned by Anthony Bonomo and Vinnie Viola, a New York horse-breeding duo, who ran away with the crown and outran second place finisher Lookin At Lee by nearly three lengths. Rounding out the podium was third place Battle of Midway who finished five lengths behind Lookin At Lee.

"It's magical," said Bonomo. "I don't know anyone who's been in the horse business who doesn't dream of this. So the name that my wife picked out -- Always Dreaming -- is what you have to do every day, especially in this business." The horse that just won the $1.24 million first prize was named for the desire and inclination to dream big in the 143rd edition of the race.

Always Dreaming is now in the running for the Triple Crown and will try to keep his crown at the Preakness Stakes taking place at the Pimlico Race Track in Baltimore on May 20.

For what it's worth, it is never truly fun to bet on the favorite. It's always sweeter when there is a sense of overcoming the odds to win some money and prove that you are the smartest bettor in the world who should probably gamble for a living.

My grandma always used to look at the names and bet based on which horse she thought had the best name. If you had to bet based off the most captivating designation this year, you might have chosen to select Thunder Snow. It sounds like an old-school WWF wrestler. If you made that bet you would have been kicking yourself right out of the gate as you can see the horse unable to overcome the muddy track conditions early on.

This is the entire race courtesy of the Kentucky Derby YouTube page.

I know Thunder Snow stole my heart as well as made a splash on social media. Don't sleep on him if he figures out how to put on hoof in front of the other. It is confirmed that the horse was not injured, just basically refused to run on the wet track.

But the first of three Triple Crown races, including the Preakness and Belmont Stakes, is known for much more than the 2-minute horse race. It is full of outrageous outfits, extravagant headwear, and the devilish mint julip. Nobody really likes mint julips, they tolerate them for a couple hours out of the year for the sake of tradition.

However terrible the mint julip may be, nobody wants to be carrying around their drink all day. Your hand gets tired. Fatigue sets in, grip strength slowly fades. Cramps set in if you're not occasionally hydrating between rounds. Maybe your entire arm falls asleep from your shoulder to your fingertips and you have to awkwardly shake-it-out. No doubt you'll get disconcerting looks from strangers and nobody wants that. One lady seems to have figured it out.

Introducing the "Mint-Julip Consumption Cap," just a little classier than the "Beer Guzzler." Only problem here is there straw connecting the julip to the mouth for optimum efficiency. But I guess that what separates that classiness. I just believe it's time we get a new derby-day drink. Nobody likes downing a dozen julips on race day, but you have to do what you have to do.

And what other event other than the Kentucky Derby will you be able to find Katie Couric enjoying a cigar with the G.O.A.T. Tom Brady and the sleek Aaron Rodgers?

Only at the most exciting two minutes in sports. Where millions, perhaps billions, of dollars in bets and wagers are lost, won, and shared globally. $138 million was wagered legally at tracks and off-track betting outlets last year, according to CNNMoney, but there is no estimating the illegal betting exchanges that undoubtedly occur.

Billions of dollars is spent globally for the Kentucky Derby. Literally billions of dollars exchanged for a two minute race. People are incredible. At the end of the day, this particular race is more about the show than the race.

Here is Rickie Fowler doing his best impersonation of a unicorn because, why not?

Yep, the Kentucky Derby is just an excuse to drink a lot and dress up ridiculously, and nobody is complaining. The more of these days we have in a year the better. Never change Kentucky Derby, the world needs you.




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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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