At 12:35 a.m. as I was starting to study for my last final exam, my best friend sent me a very emotional text about a boy. I did what any best friend would do; I told her to let things be and learn to make herself happy first. Hence, the inspiration for this new mission designed for her and anyone in need of paint-filled memories and sun-lit smiles.
In life, we knowingly surround ourselves with individuals that adore us, because they make us happy. But, in reality, your happiness should not depend on anyone else other than you. Sure, your significant other or good friend can help brighten a day but that should only be an added bonus. No relationship or friendship is healthy if your happiness solely depends on another individual.
A lot of people often forget that they should prioritize their own well-being once in a while, so here’s the chance.
The No. 1 item on the top of your summer bucket list should be learning to make yourself happy.
Items 2-99 should just be steps to achieving that goal.
Now, many of you may be thinking exactly what my best friend responded: “I want to. I want to love myself and make myself happy, but I have no idea where to start.”
Start small and simple, like testing the water before you dive in. The options I gave my best friend were ones easily met, such as painting on the lake dock by her house, or cooking a meal for her and her loved ones. Quickly after, she began naming other things she wanted to add to her Summer Bucket List for discovering her own happiness. Among them were “eat more watermelon with salt” or “maybe not the salt,” as she dipped her toes into a new level of emotional independence. Painting and cooking may not be what will make you happy, so choose something you enjoy doing or have always wanted to try -- like eating watermelon with salt.
Here are some suggestions to help you start:
If you are a big food person, try a different type of cuisine or try making a new desert. Cheesecakes are easy to make and great to taste.
If you are an animal lover, have a day trip to the zoo or to your nearest animal shelter.
If you are really adventurous, you can go skydiving or waterfall chasing.
Perhaps, just try picking up a good book or an old, classic movie and see how that changes your perspective.
In no way should you stop allowing those who care for you to bring joy into your life. Instead, add your name to the top people who can make you happy. What better skill can you have in life than an ability to make your own stomach hurt from laughing so hard?
My last challenge to you in this new adventure to learning how to love yourself is giving spontaneity a chance. You’ll find that sometimes the best memories come from unplanned events. If you are missing sand, sun, and salt-water one morning, I encourage you to make a day or weekend trip to the beach. Don’t listen to that voice in your head telling you "you shouldn’t because that’d be too random or unplanned of an action." Be spontaneous at least once this summer and focus on what makes you happy every single day.
