This Is How You Keep Her
Relationships

This Is How You Keep Her

It's not quite as complicated as you may think.

33
This Is How You Keep Her
By Tezza Photography

Appreciate her. I don’t just mean appreciate the way she looks or how she makes you feel (but you can absolutely do that too). Appreciate the way she laughs, whether it be from something you said, or a joke she heard years ago that she still thinks is funny. Appreciate the things that she does for you and with you.

Remember how she likes her tea and coffee. Remember that she loves those mixed flavor bags of Jelly Belly jelly beans, but is too impatient to eat them one at a time, and usually regrets that decision mid-bite. Remember her favorite color, and why she can't stand white chocolate or the smell of too much perfume (she has always preferred a light, fresh scent over an overpowering one). Remember that she can't fall asleep at night without a fan blowing nearby, and being all cuddled up in blankets. Try to remember important dates, like her birthday and your anniversaries.

Show her that you appreciate the way she always notices when your mood has changed and that you know how much she cares about you. Show her that you love learning her and learning why she does what she does. Show her that you notice her favorite phrases to use, that you pay attention to her facial expressions, and that you are always trying to learn what each one means. Show her that you are listening to her when she talks, and that you will work with her to keep your relationship healthy and stable.

Apologize when you have hurt her, even if it was unintentional. Hold her when she's sad, and listen to her if she wants to talk about it. She won't always need you to try to help solve the problem, but sometimes she will, and you'll start to know the difference of what she will need in each moment. Though sometimes all she really wants is someone to be there with her, supporting her, and accepting her for who she is.

That's another thing, it is important that she feels loved and supported in what she does. She doesn't need your approval or validation, but she would love to know that you are proud of her, no matter what she does. Please don't just tell her what she wants to hear, tell her what she needs to hear too. You'll learn how to say what needs to be said, and when is a good time to do so. Sometimes she may need a little tough love every now and then, in addition to all the encouragement that you give her. Love doesn't sugarcoat things, it says what needs to be said in a gentle manner.

Take her out every now and then. It doesn’t have to be super grand; it could even be a picnic or to go see a movie that she has been wanting to check out. I'm sure she'd love it if you went to the pet store to go play with puppies and hold the little rabbits. I promise it will make her feel special; she just wants to know that she is thought of and cared for.

Give her things; the important things, like your time, love, and energy. She needs consistency and deserves affection. She doesn’t need to have 100 percent of your attention 24/7, but she does need your focus to be right there with her when you’re together, and to be a priority in your life.

She loves the little things, and you don’t even have to spend a lot of money on her to make her feel appreciated; you could give her a flower you found while you two were out walking, or a bouquet of roses, or even just surprise her with a McFlurry from McDonald’s, and she would be thrilled.

She loves surprises, in all forms, even if it just means you randomly show up at her house one day during a busy week, just to see her for a few minutes. You have the ability to make her day at your very fingertips, believe me.

Gosh, even if you just send her a text or write her a letter every now and then, telling her what you love about her, she would be so happy, and I know you love seeing her face light up. There is that one particular smile that she always reserves for you. She doesn't even have to try to do so because it comes naturally when she's with you, or when someone mentions your name, or even (and especially), when she tells someone something about you. I'm sure you know exactly which one I'm talking about.

When she found you, she found someone who is always ready to have fun and is up for anything, even if it's not something you would particularly enjoy doing, simply because you get to be with her. She just wants to be happy and desires a life full of laughter. If you're not prepared to try to add to that, please give someone else a chance to do so, she deserves it.

She wants to know you, all of you, without you holding back; it will help her feel even closer to you when she is able to fully and completely see and know your heart. Once she sees it, she will love you even more. I know she's proud of who you are.

To quote a dear friend, "Butterflies come and go. Emotions are temporary. Love is a choice, and you have to make that [choice] every single day... It's not easy, but nothing worth having is easy."

I know there will be tough times, but don't give up. You must fight for her if you really want your relationship to last. One cannot dally or be lax when a problem arises. If either one of you needs space, give each other that bit of time to cool off, but try not to let the sun go down on your anger. It's best to try to work things out and discuss what went wrong as soon as possible; to not let anything get between you. Try to be understanding if she tells you that something is bothering her, even if you don't really get it, or feel like it isn't really a problem at all.

You don't have to try to be anything you're not.

Remind her why she fell for you, and why the two of you ought to stay together by simply being who you are, doing your best, and continuing to do what you did to make her your girl.

How you won her is how you will keep her. She is a prize, but she's not an object. She is rare, beautiful, and incredibly special, and you know it. She loves you for you; please don't take her for granted. She will always try to be there for you, too; she really loves you, ya know.

I know she will do her best to appreciate you just as much as you appreciate her.


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Swoon

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

If 'Hockey Is For Everyone,' Why Is Matt Dumba So Alone In Fighting For Racial Equality In The NHL?

If the NHL is using #WeSkateForEquality, why is Dumba alone in the fight for equality?

On Saturday, August 1, 2020, the National Hockey League resumed play for the first time since March 12, 2020. The season was paused due to the growing coronavirus (COVID-19) spread and a concern for the players contacting the virus and spreading it through the League. Fans and players sat and waited for the hockey season to resume, which took more than 140 days.

Keep Reading... Show less

- Though as a little girl, I had the silkiest, softest hair that would get compliments everywhere I went, since I turned about thirteen I've since had coarse, dry hair no amount of deep conditioning masks or sulfate-free shampoo could fix.

- I started using the Raincry's Condition Boar Bristle Brush several months ago, and while I noticed that my hair had been softer, silkier, and shinier than it had ever been, I didn't make the connection because I never thought a simple hairbrush could make any difference in my hair texture.

- I will be the first to admit that I thought it was ridiculous to spend nearly a hundred dollars on a hairbrush, but this one eliminates the need for me to use any heat tools or styling products on it.

- I put some oil or a serum in my hair when it's wet, brush my hair with the boar bristle brush once it's dry, and end up with the lowest maintenance, shiniest hair I've had since I was 8 years old.

@raincrybeauty

Keep Reading... Show less
YouTube

Bingeing a romantic comedy is always a good idea, and during this pandemic, these movies bring us one of the only elements of romance we can get. Through all the break-ups, obstacles, and struggles in our love lives, romantic comedies have always been there to make us laugh and keep us company while we cry.

While we love these movies for the beyond gorgeous male love interests, the female protagonists are still the ones we always remember. Although rom-coms are far from reality, it is always fun to imagine what our life would be like if a cinematic studio was behind our love life. So what does your favorite romantic comedies say about your dream guy?

Keep Reading... Show less

Whether you're in an unhealthy relationship currently, you know someone who is, or you just want to have these numbers saved just in case it could one day save someone's life (if not your own), this article is for you. Here are three numbers to save in your contacts ASAP so you can always be safe, both physically and mentally, in every relationship.

Keep Reading... Show less
Entertainment

7 Things You Need To Know About Our NEW Bachelorette, Tayshia Adams

Could THIS be the most dramatic season in "Bachelorette" history?

Bombshell news coming from Bachelor Nation today, Tayshia Adams is replacing Clare Crawley as the bachelorette!

Rumor has it that Clare found her person early on in the process and did not want to continue with the process of leading other men on throughout the season.

Keep Reading... Show less

The NBA is back, and for basketball fans, like myself, it has been the BEST news we have heard since COVID-19 shutdown play indefinitely. I mean, come on, we need to see if James Harden can once again perform so well he has back-to-back 50 point games, Kawhi can lead another team to the championship title, and whether Giannis is going to be back-to-back MVP... among like 500 other things running through our heads!

In the midst of all of the amazing statistics and records that these players are breaking, though, we also just love the NBA because well, there are some pretty good looking guys out there. Here are the 19 hottest NBA players (in no particular order) you would totally let slam dunk on you now that the NBA has returned.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Everything You Need To Know About Macronutrients, Because A Diet Should Be More Than Calories

Pay attention to what you're eating, not just how much you're eating.

Plenty of people are familiar with the "calories in, calories out" (CICO) method of dieting which can be used for losing, gaining, or maintaining weight. This method relies on calculating a person's total daily energy expenditure (TDEE) to ensure that they are not overeating or undereating to achieve their desired weight. TDEE considers a person's height, weight, age, gender, and level of activity to determine what their caloric intake should be — some calculators can factor in body fat percentage as well. When I used a TDEE calculator online, it said that my TDEE would be 1,990 calories if I was trying to maintain my weight, but are all calories created equal? I'd argue that they're not.

It might seem obvious to some of you that 1,990 calories of macaroni and cheese are not healthy at all compared to 1,990 calories of varied foods (fruit, veggies, meat, bread, etc.).

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

Just Because You're Asked To Be In A Wedding, Doesn't Always Mean You Should Say Yes

If you can't invest time, money, and YOURSELF, maybe say no to the offer for the bride's sake!

Being in a wedding is a really big commitment. I personally think if you've never been in one before, you don't understand the time, money, and energy that goes into being a part of it.

Keep Reading... Show less

As any poor college student, a little kick of caffeine for less than a dollar has always sounded great to me. So, naturally, AriZona Iced Tea has been a go-to for as long as I can remember.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

Dear Closeted Latina,

You were never alone.

Remember how the Latin world got rocked when Ricky Martin came out?

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments