Losing a close family member is really hard. Losing multiple family members in one year was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.
I lost my grandfather on my mom's side first. I was devastated. He passed away February 18, 2015, the day before my mother's birthday with his funeral on February 24, 2015, the day after mine. The next couple of months were really hard for my family, but as hard as it was, we were making it work. A couple of months later, my grandfather on my dad's side started getting worse after being sick for a while. On September 7, 2015, we got the call that he had passed away. A huge blow to the progress my family was making emotionally. One month and about two weeks later on November 16, 2015, his wife, my grandmother, had passed away. Yet another blow. They say that bad things come in three's and I guess they were right. Never in a million years would I have imagined I would lose three grandparents in the same year. But, looking on the bright side of things, if there is a bright side to this situation, I can say that I have learned a lot since February 18, 2015.
When you're going through your rebellious teen years, you want to do your own thing, hang with your friends, be with your family as little as possible. Well, I have one word for those of you reading this that are in that phase: STOP. Stop giving excuses to not talk to your grandparents on the phone. Stop looking at your phone while you are in their company. I can promise you that one day you're going to miss those times. You're going to miss all those "Back in My Day" stories. Drop everything and listen while you still can. Friends come and go but family always stays.
I went through a phase where I didn't tell my family that I loved them. I wish now that I could go back and make it up to them. Your parents need that. They need to know that you care. When my dad walked into my room to tell me that my grandfather had passed away, I realized how much those three words meant and he needed me to say them. When we were at his funeral that's all my family could say to each other. When my dad's dad passed away, that's all we could say to each other. At my grandmother's funeral, We needed to hear it even more. Tell your family you love them before it's too late.
Don't feel like you can't talk to your family. My biggest support system was my family. My fiance was there when I needed a shoulder to cry on. My brother was there to talk about the memories we had shared with our grandparents. My cousin was there to tell me how proud they were of me. We will always need someone to talk to. Don't shut them out. My family definitely helped me cope. Don't keep everything bottled in because it will explode and you will feel worse in the end.
Take comfort in your religion. A couple days after my grandfather's death I was browsing Facebook and found a bible verse that really spoke to me. It said, "Blessed be those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." I read that every day for weeks and felt better than I had felt all year. In fact, it helped me so much that my dad requested that it be said during the funeral.
I know this article isn't for everyone, but honestly, I wrote it for myself. Losing family members is never easy. But as hard as it is, there are always lessons to be learned. I know that they are happy and no longer suffering and that I will be reunited with them one day.
