It's taken me six years to get over the damage that was caused when I was 15. It's taken 6 years to realize how much more I had to grow in life and that people would come into my life and change it dramatically. I did not realize that I had so much more to offer the world than just a pretty face. However, it saddens me it took me THIS long to realize the potential and the greatest that is within me. If I could redo the past six years of my life, there are few things I would want to tell my 15 year old self so that I wouldn't have to waste six years of my life being unconfident and afraid.
Dear 15 year old self,
Stop listening to those that do not matter. As once beautifully stated, "opinions are like assholes, everyone has one," BUT that doesn't mean that you should listen to it.
You spent six years of your life listening to people who only tried to put you down whether that be for your personality, your weight, or the way you lived your life. You could not be yourself because you feared that someone would dissapprove. But the saddest part is that half of the people that used to speak their mind, do not even matter now. They aren't in your life. They are irrelevant. You wasted so much time caring about what others thought about you, that you forgot to think about how you thought about you.
Speak your mind.
When you were young, you used to speak your mind and give positive feedback and constructive criticism but as you got older, you lost that. You forgot that it was okay to have a voice. You cannot and should not be silenced.
You have more to offer than just a pretty face. You are intelligent, kind hearted, thoughtful, witty and bright.
It is okay to take care of yourself and look good but do not forget about all the other qualities you have to offer the world. You are worth more than just a five letter word. You can be pretty but you are also pretty intelligent, pretty funny, pretty kind. Those are the qualities that are most important. Do not forget to share those things with the world.
Stop comparing yourself to others. You will never be anyone than who you are. You were wonderfully made and the people that love you will always be there for you.
A large part of your life has been dedicated to low self-esteem and self-doubt. You have lacked confidence for most of your life, which has caused you to miss out on a lot of opprotunities. Stop comparing yourself to the girl in your English class or the homecoming queen. You are not a size two. You do not have to be a size two to be beautiful. Stop hiding and start living. Stop worrying about how your legs look in those leggings or how your back rolls look in a top. Go out and enjoy life for once.
During a time where confidence is key, many 15 year olds are silenced, shamed and confused. They do not know how to feel, what to think or how to feel about themselves. If you did not love your 15 year old self back then, please give yourself a little extra love now. You deserve it.
