1. Stop trying to destroy yourself to feel better.
No amount of drinking will actually make you forget the way it felt to be in love. No amount of Monday hangovers will take make up for still being hung up on someone that said would love you forever. Stop thinking if you smoke enough or drink enough it will disappear. It won’t. It’ll hurt more in the long run if you keep hurting yourself.
2. Cry, Scream, But Stop.
You are allowed to cry about them. You are allowed to scream in your car on your way to work when it feels like your insides are only there to hold your skeleton together. You are allowed to grieve them for not being who they said they would be, but stop. Stop crying after two months. Stop hating them for leaving. You will move on and you will be stronger. You don’t go through this and not get better.
3. Don’t check up on them.
It’s self explanatory. Don’t check their Facebook, Instagram, or Snapchat. Delete them. Block them and move on. Maybe in two years, they’ll pop up on your news feed again, and maybe it’ll be right or maybe it won’t, but it will be OK.
4. You are not ruined.
You are still here. This is not the end of your life, it’s just a new beginning. Please believe that things will get so much better. You will look back and think about the girl on the floor crying over unanswered words and you will be OK. You’ll find them moving on and it won’t ache anymore. You are not ruined because one person couldn’t love you. You are still lovable.
5. Eat
Please eat and stay hydrated. Crying takes a lot of work. Pretending not to hurt takes a lot of energy. Eat your soup and drink your orange juice.
6. Don’t hide from the world.
It hurts to move and the sun burns, but get out and try. You have friends that love you enough to pick up the phone at 1 a.m. You have people that will love you even when the skies are falling and you are awake at 4 a.m. cranky as all. Get out, do what you love. Do all the things you haven’t done in years.
7. You’ll love again.
Even if it’s not romantic love, you’ll love again. You’ll love everything that you forgot you even loved when you were with them. The quiet that comes with bookstores, the noise that comes with concerts, the screaming at sport events. You’ll fall in love again... and maybe the next time it’ll be better.
