In the past I have lost many important people in my life. My dad, my aunt, and my great grandmother. I miss them dearly. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about them. When I bring them up in casual conversation, like when I say ‘my father passes away when I was four’, people always say ‘oh, I’m so sorry.’ Not that I am not grateful for them saying that, it’s just annoying. Even when a person had just lost someone important to someone, I can guarantee you that they don’t want to hear it. I know that I don’t.

1. “I am so sorry”

Like I said, it’s annoying when people say this to me. It wasn’t your fault. Stop saying this. It’s okay.

2. “It’ll be okay”

I know it will be okay. But at this moment, it’s not okay. I just lost someone important to me.

3. Hugging someone.

I know this isn’t something that people say, but it’s more what they do. When you give someone a hug, you are just reminding them of something they don’t want to remember. When you go up to them, they know why you’re going up to them. It’s not the same when you normally go up to them.

4. “If you need anything, just ask”

There is one thing that I need, and you can’t make it happen.

I know that when I tell people that I lost my father, people say that they are sorry. What they don’t know is that it’s annoying. I know and I am grateful for them being sympathetic, but please understand that I don’t want to hear you say these things to me.