13 Things All Midwesterners Say

13 Things All Midwesterners Say That West Coasters Don't Have In Their Vocabulary

Michigan slang ain't my thang

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The country would be so boring if we all didn't have a few quirks in our speech.

1. The Mitten

The infamous Michigan hand map and you'll only understand what they're doing if you know they call MI the Mitten, using their hand like a directory.

2. Meijers and Krogers

Adding an S to the end of company names: "Are you going to Krogers?" "I just got back from Meijers"

3. Pop

Soda.

4. Ope

Instead of saying I'm sorry, excuse me or my bad when they accidentally run into someone or something they say "OPE!"

5. Didja (Did you)

Combining words so that they can speak even faster than they already do. "Didja eat" "Didja finish your homework already"

6. Immuna (I'm gunna)

and once again...

7. Secretary of State

I think they might be one of the only states that don't call it the DMV...

8. Meer

They can't take the 5 extra seconds to pronounce two more syllabus and most of them don't even realize they do this.

9. C'mere (Come here)

and again.

10. Cloze

They're heavy on their Z's

11. Turning T's into D's

Butter is budder, letter is ledder.

12. Sumpin

One I'll never pick up on.

(Do you want "sumpin" to eat?)

13. DAAAAAAAAAD

Heavy on the "ee-yeah" and not afraid to draw it out too.

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75 Of The Most Iconic Vine Quotes

"I smell like beef"

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Vine may be dead but Vine references live on. I still watch Vine threads AT LEAST twice a day. Here are 75 of the most quotable vines:

1. "Ooooooo, he needs some milk."

2. "Hi, welcome to Chili's."

3. "It is Wednesday, my dudes."

4. "Country boy, I love you ahhhwweelhwh..."

5. "Escalera oooooooaaaa!"

6. "F**k ya chicken strips!"

7. "Barbecue sauce on my titties."

8. "Gimme your F**KING money!"

9. "That was legitness."

10. "Ms. Keisha, MS. KEISHA! Oh my f**king God, she f**king dead."

11. "Fre-sha-vocado."

12. "Staaaahp! I coulda dropped my croissant!"

13. "That's my OPINION."

14. "You're not my dad, ugly ass f**king noodle head."

15. "What the f**k, Richard."

16. "This bitch empty, YEET!"

17. "Road work ahead? Yeah, I sure hope it does."

18. "What up, I'm Jared I'm 19, and I never f**king learned how to read."

19. "Um, I'm never been to oovoo javer."

20. "My God, they were roommates."

21. "Why are you running, why are you running?"

22. "Whoever threw that paper, your mom's a hoe."

23. "I can't swim."

24. "Lebron James."

25. "It's an avocado, thanksssss..."

26. "Mother trucker dude, that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick."

27. "Watch your profanity."

28. "I love you bitch, I ain't never gonna stop loving you, biiiiiitch."

29. "What are thoooooose?"

30. "I smell like beef."

31. "You better stop."

32. "What the F**K IS UP KYLE?"

33. "Come get y'all juice."

34. "Two bros, chilling in a hot tub, 5 feet apart cause they're not gay."

35. "So you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday to my birthday party on my birthday with a birthday gift?"

36. "I wanna be a cowboy, baby."

37. "Why you always lying?"

38. "Nice Ron" "I sneezed, oh, what, am I not allowed to sneeze?"

39. "I'm washing me and my clothes."

40. "Honey, you've got a big storm coming."

41. "XOXO, gossip girl."

42. "Shoutout to all the pear."

43. "A potato flew around my room before you came."

44. "Chipotle is my life."

45. "Look at all those chickens!"

46. "YOU BETTER STOP."

47. "I like turtles."

48. "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life, watermelon, INSIDE A WATERMELON."

49. "Deez nuts, HA GOT EM?"

50. "F**k you, I don't want no ravioli."

51. "21."

52. "I'm in my mum's car, broom broom."

53. "Iridocyclitis."

54. "You know what, I'm about to say it."

55. "That is NOT correct."

56. "Uh, I'm not finished" "Oh my God, can you let me do what I need to do?"

57. "I have osteoporosis."

58. "ADAM."

59. "Merry Chrysler."

60. "Wait a minute, who ARE you?"

61. "Try me, bitch."

62. "When will you learn, THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?"

63. "I didn't get no sleep cause of y'all, y'all not gone get no sleep cause of me!"

64. "Do you want to go see Uncle Cracker or no?"

65. "So no head?"

66. "You got eczema."

67. "I am shooketh."

68. "Hey my name is Trey, I have a basketball game tomorrow."

69. "Can I PLEASE get a waffle?"

70. "There is only one thing worse than a rapist." "A child."

71. "Ah f**k, I can't believe you've done this."

72. "Bitch, I hope the f**k you do."

73. "Two shots of vodka."

74. "F**k off Janet, I'm not going to your f**king baby shower."

75. "JEEEEEZ, Jesus Christ."

Cover Image Credit:

Vine/Katie Ryan

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Stand-Up Comedy Can Make The Most Stressful Days Way Easier

If you're stressed to the max, I highly recommend giving stand-up comedy specials a try!

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Have you ever been laying in bed after a long and stressful day, scrolling through Netflix, trying to find something to watch? You can't make a decision on something, so you decide to try something new. Now, this could be a big mistake or you could find something amazing. This happened to me a few weeks ago and somehow I ended up in the stand-up comedy section. I have seen a couple of clips of Gabriel Iglesias, or "Fluffy," on YouTube in the past, but I've never watched a stand-up comedy special on Netflix before. It never was appealing to me and I don't know many people that watch stand-up.

After deciding to watch Gabriel Iglesias' new Netflix special, I was intrigued. Then, my friend told me that I had to watch Bert Kreischer's new Netflix special. He promised that I would find it funny and that he was really good. He added that Bert does all of his performances shirtless and it makes it that much funnier. So, I watched it and I've been hooked to stand-up ever since. Now, I've become a fan of the many classic stand-up comedians that many people know and love like Kevin Hart, Ellen Degeneres, and Iliza Shlesinger as well. It quickly became something I couldn't get enough of, especially after a stressful day. I figured out that even after the most trying day and even when I was extremely stressed or drowning in homework, I forgot about all of that. I got an hour to myself to just take a breath, have a good laugh, and forget about all of my problems.

A lot of times, I use the hour to eat some food while I watch the special or just lay in bed for a little while and enjoy forgetting about all of the things I could be doing. I've also learned some things. Like the fact that Ellen got her start by doing stand-up, or that Fluffy is coming to Columbus this summer to do a show. I also learned that even though these people are celebrities and have thousands of followers and fans, they're very relatable and more like me than I realized. We sometimes forget that they are people too.

I highly recommend taking an hour out of your day to see if stand-up comedy could be a stress reliever for you. This is definitely a topic that many people don't think of when it comes to relieving stress or getting into a better mood. I'm glad I stumbled across this new found stress reliever to be able to try something different and new and to enjoy a good laugh while doing so. If you're down in the dumps or having a hard day, try watching stand-up. I promise it'll make your day better.

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