It's one of the toughest things we ever had to go through in Elementary school: talking about genetics and where we get characteristics based on our parents. What teachers never thought about was the adopted children in the class.

When it was our turn to share, we would pause, look down and around the room and hesitate. "Uhm, well I'm adopted so I'm not sure where I get my characteristics from."

Dead silence fell over the room and all eyes are us.

The teacher would then ask something along the lines of "Well, have you ever seen pictures or have your parents told you about your birth parents?"

"No."

You would think the conversation would stop there, but it never did.

Kids would ask why you were adopted, how old you were, and if you were from another country.

It's very uncomfortable for us to be put on the spot about a topic that is so near and dear to our hearts.

Please, do not ask questions, do not act shocked, and do not make us feel different.

We have self-esteem issues already along with anxiety and growing up was a battle for us.

We never feel like we would fit in, whether it was with our family, friend group, or elsewhere.

Please help us feel accepted. Please do not ask us questions because most of us do not like to talk about our adoption.

Put yourself in our position.

Imagine this:

You are a newborn baby being brought home from the hospital. Months pass by and you and your mother are comfortable and happy.

Then the state comes in your life and everything is different.

You are ripped from your mother's arm because she was unable to provide proper care for you because she put her needs before your own.

You go from foster home to foster home at such a young age when you know nothing around you. All you know is confusion.

Please keep in mind this is all taking place during a time when the laws are changing, so your foster parents may lose you. The laws are changing to give your birth mother visitation rights, and as many chances as she would like to get her life on track. This means she can gain you back into her care.

Your foster parents fight for three long years for you and you are unable to advocate for yourself. Your foster parent's free time is spent fighting with the court to rule on their side because they can give you what is best for you- Love and Care.

On March 17th, the court ruled that your foster parents would gain full custody of you. Your parents cry tears of joy and you at just three years of age are full of happiness, but you don't understand what is happening.

Years later, it hits you.

Your mother couldn't care for you because she was a drug addict.

The state stepped in, put her in jail and you in foster care.

You used to visit her in jail at a young age.

Your foster parents fought for you because they love and can give you love and the care that you need. They have the time, money, and effort to put into you.

You are humbled by this and before long, it all makes sense.

Your parents do love you and you do regret fighting with your mother saying "I wish I had my real mother back."

Those hurtful words you can never take back.

Being adopted is always in the back of your mind.

So please, when you hear that someone is adopted, please don't ask rude questions. It was a tough childhood growing up and being accepted because we were seen as "different."

If we want to talk, let us talk about it. If we chose not to talk, please don't pry and try to ask questions.

Not everyone is comfortable talking about their adoption.

Thank you.