You’re at a frat party pouring poison down your throat to try and build up some fake courage. One shot deep, you scope the room and are overwhelmed. Two shots deep, you enter the sweaty mob of drunk people and start to dance with your friends. Three shots deep, you’re dancing with a boy and have no idea where he even came from, but you happily dance with him anyways. Four shots deep, you’re thrown up against the wall while he sticks his vodka-soaked tongue down your throat. Five shots deep, he takes your hand and you follow him home.

Suddenly, your clothes are coming off and you realize that you don’t know a thing about this guy. That doesn’t stop you. You don’t even know his name, and you are giving your most vulnerable self to him as you lay exposed on his sheets.

Next thing you know it, you open your eyes and its bright outside. You have a pounding headache. You look over and don’t see the bright colored tapestry hanging from the wall and the motivational canvases that speckle the closet doors. You realize that you’re not in your bedroom. You slip on your clothes from last night and find your way back home. While climbing into bed, you begin to question your own self-respect and who you are, which leads you to collapse into tears.

A week goes by and you pass each other on the way to class. He doesn’t even acknowledge you.

This is not the way it should be.

The sad part is that this is the everyday reality on all college campuses and I’m sick of it.

I’m tired of participating in it. I’m done disrespecting myself and lowering my standards.

Walking into a Monday morning class and overhearing a girl list all of her regrets from the past weekend, has become something way too common. It disappoints me to see people stumble around with crutches and listen to them laugh about how they don’t know or remember how they broke a bone.

Our eyes should light up when we talk about our weekends. We should be able to talk about how much fun we had and the amazing memories that we made.

I’ve come to the realization that this hookup and drinking culture that we live in is beyond deranged. So many of us seek our self-worth in boys by objectifying ourselves for a night just to feel shi**y and insecure the next morning. We fill our bodies with toxic substances that let us alter our personalities so we can try and fit the mold.

But the questions I keep asking myself are what are we getting out of this? Since when does our body count determine how attractive we are? Why do we find enjoyment in not being in control of our bodies? Why do we make the goal of the night to get wasted and go home with a boy? Why is it becoming a norm to not remember what happened?

I don’t understand what makes us feel confident by giving ourselves to a guy we don’t know. Yes, I’ve been there. But the confidence only lasted for the moment. The next morning, I felt worse than I did before. I wished I hadn’t done it.

Is it because they tell us that we’re pretty? Because most of the time they are just saying that to get in our pants.

In today’s generation, we will do anything to feel cared about.

This is why we pump ourselves full of alcohol to try and fit in.

This is why we let a boy we don’t know touch our bare skin.

We want to know that people care and that we matter, and maybe that’s where the root of the problem is.

We don’t need a boy or alcohol to verify who we are and how much we are worth.

All of those times when you are with your friends laughing at YouTube videos, stuffing your face with Cookout fries, or having a dance party in the kitchen at 2 a.m.; don’t you feel worth it then?

They are the ones who are important in your life, and they truly value the authentic you.

Now please don’t mistake my words, I’m not saying that partying and hooking up is wrong. I'd be a hypocrite if I said that. I’m saying that the way that we treat ourselves in this “party culture” is something that upsets me.

So, my message to you is: next time you decide to go out, look after yourself. If you want to drink to get drunk, do it because you want to, not because you feel like you need to. If you want to go home with the random boy you just met, that’s okay. But remind yourself that it’s probably nothing more than a one-night stand. Ask yourself if you are okay with it. Be mindful of your decisions and know your values.

Respect yourself enough to know what you deserve, and give yourself that.

You are so worth it.