When losing a best friend it happens to be the hardest thing you will ever go through. I've found it is always an unexpected thing whether you are slowly drifting or you end up having this big blow out where you are sending mean text messages to one another -- it all feels the same and that is this feeling of emptiness. You tell yourself that it is the right thing and you are better off, which chances are you are. If someone can walk away from you then you should hold the door open for them. If you really mattered they would never let you out of their life. As time goes on you no longer know who was to blame for the friendship ending and you no longer even care.

You are allowed to be angry. It was hard for me to accept the people I thought were in my corner never really were. It is all a learning process and it is a rather unfortunate one. I still have days where people ask me why I no longer talk to my best friend and I simply just shrug. I will ponder that question for what seems like days and then once again I am taken back by the fact I am still angry. I have a right to be angry, maybe it is not all directed towards my old best friend, but at the situation, because the situation sucks.

You are allowed to miss them. I tried for weeks with my best friend to communicate but I did not get much effort back therefore I stopped, because if I mattered there would have been way more effort, and for that reason I guess I am okay with the friendship ending. Just the other day I heard some juicy gossip and she was the first person I wanted to call, but I felt the sting of realization they are no longer that person for me. I still struggle with missing them especially lately as I continue to make adult life choices. I needed them for these moments.

Let go. This is the big step. I still struggle with this step because I thought after months without communication I would finally get something, but I have yet to get anything, which I did not think it could hurt anymore than it already does, but it does. It hurts that they can see their memories on Facebook and I be in them and they shrug it off. How? Please let me know how you have managed this. I question your heart at that point. How does it not sting? you must let go of the fact you hope they will come back to your life. Once you let go of that possibility it is much easier to let go of the hurt.

Acceptance. Also a step I guess I personally have not gotten to. How do I accept that a friendship I cherished so much has come to an end? How does anyone? I have learned you must stop trying to question their actions. They felt it was time to put an end to a friendship and questioning it will not help you through your process at all. If they wanted to fix something they would. You look back on your friendship and you cherish your moments together. You find a friendship that is better because if a fight, a new relationship, or anything causes a true friendship to end than it was not ever strong to begin with and it is not worth holding on to.

Everyone has different steps. I still stumble on these steps and have to readjust. Losing friendships is common, unfortunately. It is something I did not realize was all a part of growing up until mine started to fall a part. People who I thought were going to be bridesmaids in my wedding just seemed to disappear. I still find myself upset over the people who left, but I know that it has taught me the qualities I want in a friendships and the qualities I do not. You just realize you have to learn you deserve an unbreakable friendship and anything less is unacceptable

But the truth is behind lost friendships is: They hurt.