We've all experienced drifting apart from a good friend in one way or another, whether it be them moving away or simply growing and changing as people. One of the most difficult ways to lose touch with a friend is because of an argument. Though in the beginning it may be easy to push a tight relationship aside because of anger and bitterness, as the time passes it becomes more difficult to forget the friendship. The feeling of no longer speaking to the person you saw nearly everyday is not easy to understand, and even more difficult when that person no longer wishes to be your friend.
The last time I experienced this with a good friend I was rattled, nearly blindsided by what had happened. Though in the beginning I was bitter and didn't care much about what would come of it, as the weeks and the months had passed it became harder and harder to accept that I had lost my best friend. I kept trying to make amends but every attempt I made was futile. Eventually I gave up, and as I prepared to feel lonely without my best friend who was by my side for a year I experienced a feeling I never had in this situation.
After I realized this was inevitable I wasn't angry anymore but actually thankful, and I feel more grateful about the situation everyday. I would never say I regret any part of our friendship, it was an amazing year and in that year I experienced some of the best moments in my life so far. Though I also realized how negative the overtone of my life had become in that year. My mind had become clouded with pessimistic thoughts and our daily conversations had mostly been composed of discussing celebrity rumors and scandals. As the days would go on without speaking to one another I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders. I no longer had to tiptoe around topics too keep from rocking the boat.
When I finally started to accept that this friendship had ended for a good reason negativity fled from my life a little bit more each day. I finally realized I was a lot happier without this person in my life. Instead of allowing myself to feel lonely with one less person in my life I embraced the people I had in it and the new relationships that were forming. Focusing on those that love me unconditionally instead of putting all my energy into a relationship i knew was over was one of the best decisions I had ever made. I finally had time for myself, I had more time and energy to put into school and work. Even my attitude towards the people I love and the way I look at everyday has become brighter. I make a conscious attempt to be kinder to each person I encounter, and I don't know if any of this change would have happened if I hadn't lost the person that was unintentionally holding me back. Though I'm not glad I lost this friendship, I am extremely grateful that I was given the opportunity to take another look at how I live my life and how I treat the people I love.
