My name is Elizabeth Patterson. It is comprised of seven vowels and eleven consonances, but I am much more than this bundle of letters. I am 5'2", 115lbs, and I have been on this earth for 7784 days, but these numbers do not describe me. I grew up in the small town of Roanoke, Virginia; tucked into a valley that's sheltered by the Blue Ridge Mountains. I graduated from a small Catholic school, and every Sunday my family and I went to mass at our church on the hill.This was me- so I thought.
Now I find myself in Fredericksburg, Virginia -179 miles, three hours and twenty-seven minutes away from everything I thought I was. But what I've come to find out in the eleven months I've been away, is that who we are is comprised of two main things: how we interpret who we are and how we present ourselves to others.
For the first section, how we interpret who we are, I have found that we interpret who we are from a number of groups, or communities, that we have chosen to be a part of. Religion, family relationships, moral values and political stances are all examples of communities we choose to help define who we are. These groups help us form strong relationships with like-minded people.
However, when others interpret these groups too literally it causes animosity between people that would otherwise be very similar. This is where how we present who we are to others comes into play. Part of the maturity process is learning how to have sub-groups that you relate to while still being an approachable, open minded member of society. (Some people never fully reach this equilibrium which can cause them to come off as rude or abrasive.)
Through observation, I was able to come up with this description of how one defines who they are. However, it wasn't until I applied this idea to my own life that I began to understand the magnitude of what "who I am" means.
As many of my elders promised, college is full of personal growth- a time to discover the major parts of who you are, but this does not come without adversity. Since being in college I have found myself focusing more on how I present myself to others than on how I am actually. I went from going to church every Sunday to laughing at Christian stereotypes so no one would think I was a "crazy Catholic." In an instant, there was now 179 miles between who I am and who I was portraying myself as. The very things I had worn so proudly on my heart now, eleven months later, labeled me an outsider.
The idea "Who I Am" was always a concept I thought I understood, but I have come to see that the idea of self is a delicate combination of who we are and who we portray ourselves as.
I am Elizabeth Patterson, a crazy Catholic girl from a small town shaded by the Blue Ridge Mountains and as I struggle to write this article I realized - I don't know who I am yet.
