This semester I was lucky enough to get accepted to study abroad in London, England my favorite place in the entire world. Since I got accepted I have went through several different stages of emotions leading up to the last weeks before I leave for winter break. I’ve experienced the happiest of feelings and the saddest of feelings but when it boils down to it, I’m still excited to leave.
At first I experienced extreme happiness. The moment I opened the email from my program I called my mom crying because I was so happy. I was so excited that I get escape my university for an entire semester to go to a city I fell in love with when I was only five years old. My entire life I had dreamt of traveling to London and going to school. All of my dreams were finally coming true and I couldn’t hold it in.
As time went on and as I started to get all my classes approved, applying for housing and booking my flights it started to feel unreal. I was going to be in London for four months, on my own. This is my third semester in college and it wasn’t until now that I realized I’m an adult. I’m not fifteen years old having my mom drive me to school anymore. It seemed so unreal that I was going to be able to go to watch my favorite soccer team and walk down the streets that my parents did when they lived there. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that everything I had wished for was given to me.
Now we’ve hit the tail end of the semester and the unreal turns into reality and it actually hurt. I looked at my countdown app and saw that I had 33 days until I leave Tampa for New York and 68 days until I leave New York for London and it hit me like a truck. In 33 days I have to say goodbye to my best friends, my college family, and people that I can’t go a day without seeing. I don’t get to see these people until the fall of 2016. Nine months without my sorority sisters, nine months without my littles, nine months without my best friend. As excited as I am to leave, I’m dreading to say goodbye. I’m not the best at goodbyes so it’s going to be the hardest part.
Even though traveling abroad has been something I have dreamt of my entire life I still feel guilty for leaving. I know that when I’m abroad I’m going to have the best time of my life and I’m so excited for that but knowing that I won’t have someone to stay up until three a.m. with almost every night makes me upset. I realized over time that I should be selfish just this one time because how often do dreams come true anyway?
