Strictly speaking, anxiety disorders are no laughing matter, but with a slight twist of dark humor, it’s easy to see the amusement behind the high blood pressure. The persistent worry and the relentless stress can quickly create an unlivable psychological state—but, I mean consider the lengths we go through to avoid a simple, small talk conversation regarding the weather and the weekend ahead. My fellow anxiety prone chums, you know as well as I that we will walk a whole extra block or two on our way home just to avoid saying hello to our extra friendly neighbor.
It’s not an easy life we lead. And please don’t tell us to “just calm down” for we will happily whack you over the head with a sledgehammer (because trust me, we’ve carefully thought out every violent circumstance that could possibly happen therefore we’re all very confident we could easily get away with murder.) However, with time comes growth. Whether you manage by meditating or medicating, sometimes it’s necessary to see the silliness behind our neurosis. So, veterans of high anxiety, here's to a laugh at ourselves. Try to relax and see the silver lining! Here are a few moments we are all too familiar with but perhaps deserve a chuckle.
1. The irrational fear we have of exercising in public, but just trust me, no one is looking at you anyway.
2. That stressful moment when you thought you were on donut number two but it’s actually donut number seven.
…It’s okay, have another, you’ll feel better.
3. When you respond to a greeting that wasn’t meant for you and you think to yourself “well, I might as well start digging my grave now.”
4. You just had a perfectly friendly, free flowing conversation with a very normal person and then all hell breaks loose inside your head as you replay and analyze every word that was said. Darling please, you were great!
5. You have to practice exactly what you're going to say to the pizza guy 10 times before you even pick up the phone. I mean, how hard is it to say, “I’d like a large pepperoni pizza with a side of cinnamon sticks?” (If all that food is just for you, I understand, it’s perfectly okay to eat your feelings.)
6. Saying “what” three times in a row but you still can’t seem to understand what they’re trying to tell you... sorry, there are no words for this one.
7. Answering the door for the handyman and then promptly running to hide behind your closed bedroom door. Did you really just leave a stranger alone in your house?
Living with anxiety can be suffocating, frustrating and unfortunately, just life for some of us, but what’s life if you can’t laugh a little? It will all be okay in the end so go ahead, have another donut, devour your feelings, and put off the gym for another day. Take a deep breath and have a laugh because you’ll get to your destination eventually. Warriors of anxiety, let’s stand together in the privacy of our own homes! We feel for you in our own individual way!
