Dealing With The Mirror Complex
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

Dealing With The Mirror Complex

You get in what you put out.

3377
Dealing With The Mirror Complex
jill111

In sociology, there's a concept called the “Looking-Glass Self.” The idea of it, is that you build your self-image based on comments that you receive from other people. This ends up affecting the way that we act; if you're told all your life that you're a smart student, you'll generally perform better on exams. The opposite is true; if you're told that you are unintelligent, your exam scores will be poor. That being said, I think it's also true that the things we say to ourselves can also affect our Looking-Glass Selves. I believe it also relates directly to how we act subconsciously.

A phrase my mom used to chirp whenever my sister or I weren’t sure if we could accomplish something, was “Fake it ‘til you make it." As many of us do, I started to lose my self-confidence in middle school, and it stayed that way into high school. In order to combat this, I would majorly up-sell myself. Any time I received a negative comment or thought somebody was giving me a nasty look, I would tell myself that I was a goddess. A person who would achieve far more than anyone who was mean to her and would have more people fall for her than Miss Universe.

And it worked wonders! The overwhelming positive took over the nasty negativity and my self-esteem balanced out quite nicely. I didn't feel nearly as bad as I did before, and I came to find that I did feel more confident in myself as time went on. However, I like to think that the things we say to ourselves limit more than our self-confidence.

As I mentioned earlier, being told you're a good or bad student can affect your test scores. But I think it goes beyond that. Let me explain with another example: I've never had a good sense of time. Sometimes I couldn't tell what day it was, and oftentimes I couldn't judge the passage of time very well. When I started to work overnights three days a week, it got considerably worse and became a running joke between me and my friends. These jokes passed as most do, and I noticed that the less I thought about my inability to keep track of time, the less I forgot what day it was and how far through the week we were. Because I told myself I had no sense of time, I ended up living the lie. Just as telling yourself that you're the best despite feeling your worst, telling yourself you're bad at something can dramatically drop your performance.

It's important to point out that, to my knowledge, this isn't scientific or something you'll learn in a Psych class. It's something that I've noticed in the past few years. But, if it's worked for me thus far, I have faith that it can work for anybody else!

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Ask Your BFF These 20 Questions To See If They Know You As Well As You THINK That They Do

My best friend has been in my life since we were 3 years old, now that we are adults now, I'd like to ask her these questions to see how well she knows me.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Alone At The Met

I survive a day alone in NYC.

6498
Wikimedia Commons

It was six in the evening. I was sitting in the courtyard of a Renaissance-era Italian villa, glancing around at the statues, most notably one of a boy removing a thorn from his foot. Despite the supposedly relaxing setting, I was incredibly anxious. My phone was at less than 5 percent battery, and once it died I would be completely disconnected from my family and peers, alone in one of the largest art museums in the country.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

College 101: How To Ease The Back To School Blues

Getting back into the school groove when you just can't seem to let go of summer.

9212
Beyond The States

With fall classes just beginning, many of us find ourselves struck with summer withdrawals. Especially for those who refrained from taking courses over the summer, it can be quite difficult to get back in the swing of things. Fortunately, there are various ways to help make the transition back to college as smooth as possible.

Keep Reading... Show less
Dating Apps

We Met At A Bar

Salvage what you can; if you can't, it's alright to walk away.

6587
We Met At A Bar
Anne Waldon

We met at a bar.

Keep Reading... Show less
Sports

The Mets And Me

They may be the worst sometimes, but this baseball team has given me more than I could ask for.

5359
Rich Schultz/Getty Images

On September 3rd, 2001, a sea of children littered my home's navy-carpeted den to watch baseball during my dad's 40th birthday extravaganza. A baseball game flickered on the TV, and a red and blue bubble of a scoreboard sat in the bottom right corner of the screen. The New York Mets and the Philadelphia Phillies were in a wild game at Veterans' Stadium. As I, a five-year-old boy with a jumble of curly blonde hair, sat in the back of the kid clump, I wondered which team I should root for. After a long debate with myself, I decided that I should root for the team that's winning (duh). But, as the ninth inning rolled around with the Phils maintaining a 7-5 lead, some magic occurred. The Mets put up five runs in one frame, stunning the Phillie fans in the room and winning the game 10-7.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments