This week I wanted to talk about darkness. Yep, darkness. (Insert your own scary music here.) Darkness is frightening, yet very comforting. In the darkness, you can hide. Hide your past, hide your feelings, hide yourself. You can hide from pretty much anything. Trust me, I’ve done it before.
Actually, I did it this week. Someone made me upset, like the kind where you don’t know whether to cry, punch a wall, or just laugh at how sad my life could get. (Or, all three). I tried going into my room and shutting off the lights, hoping when I wake up it won’t be so bad. I thought that maybe if I did shut of the lights, the sun would stop shining for not only myself, but for everyone else too.
But, here’s the thing.
It’s not forever.
We seem to forget that even though we have bad times, we have good times too. You are not defined by the moments that make you the weakest, or the moments we feel like we don’t exist. You are not defined by anything you don’t want to be, actually.
It is so okay to be upset. Cry, and punch a wall, like I did (However, I should warn you that it actually hurts more than it helps). You might not see it, but everyone has these moments. Yes, even the girls who you never see upset, the ones who parade around your campus with more friends than you can count, or are a size 0 jean size, or don’t even have to wear makeup and they look flawless. Some people just hide it better than others.
We can sit around and be upset all day,
Or we can turn on the light.
Turn on the light literally, but also turn on our internal light.
Let’s face it, ladies, you are a light. A beautiful, wonderful, inspiring light. And you burn brighter than any bad days you will have.
We have a choice on how to live our lives. We can sit around all we want and define ourselves by numbers or things we write down or the bad days we have or we can define ourselves by the things we do, the people we touch, and the love we give. Choose light, and choose love. I’ve dealt with a lot, but I’ve also learned a lot about myself these past couple of years, and this has been a long time coming. If its anything I need to tell you it’s that when you stop looking for the light, you become it instead. I decided to stop comparing myself to others, I stopped talking down on myself, and most importantly, I stopped hiding. I faced the world with confidence and happiness (with a bad day here and there), and honestly I have never felt brighter. Brighter internally, and a brighter light in this world.
I really believe it. So stop turning you're lights off, stop hiding your flaws, and stop putting yourself down. You are the light, and use that light to change the world. I believe in you.
And trust me, the best is yet to come. Keep holding out.
“ The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” John 1:5
