It was like a soft gasp at the beginning of a song. I remember the feeling I got as I pushed the door open. The beginning of something that would be beautiful and tragic – at least for me.

"I'm ready to start dating," He said, as I sat there holding my hands together tightly. I looked up and said, "You are?"

You should know, he didn't mean with me, he would never mean with me, but how could I blame him for his feelings? I tried to hide the hurt on my face as I whispered, "I can't help thinking I was never enough."

There it was. Something I knew I had been afraid to admit was now out there for the two of us.

There you were.

Suddenly, I was nervous, but you were steps away and I couldn't turn back now. Laughing as you made a joke about looking for my "mom van," I suddenly felt small next to you.

I want you to know that even though I was sad, I could never hate you. You saw through my fake smile and tried to reach out to me, but I sat back, unsure I could handle a hug from you. It would just hurt more.'

"You are more than enough, but our lives are going on separate paths that just burst together sometimes," he said finally. I knew he was right. We weren't right for each other.

I was bending over backwards for someone, even though I knew it would never work. I could never force him to want me.

I remember talking to my roommate about you. She told me that she thought I liked the idea of us more then anything. But isn't that part of liking someone? Liking the idea of them?

I know you thought that I had fallen hard for you, but in reality I was unsure. I was scared, because I didn't want to get close to anyone again. You would be graduating soon and things had been bad between us.

We were fighting constantly. Stress and insecurities had built up. I didn't want to feel like that about a person I would be with. But then you graduated and suddenly... everything felt better.

The last time I went to see you, I truly knew I had feelings for you. I had asked you if I could have have a Sprite. You told me I could, laughed and said I could have whatever I wanted. That was it for me – as silly as it sounds.

Now, as I think about it, I know that your friendship will always be something I cherish. Even though we aren't right for each other, I wouldn't trade your friendship for the world. You taught me so much about myself.

You taught me that there are actual good guys out there and that I deserve to be treated the way you treated me. I had learned what it felt like to have someone stay, despite the hard times.