In recent weeks, in the ebbing, glowy haze of Valentine's Day, I have found myself paying special attention to the relationships around me. With the start of some new relationships, the ending of others, and the reaffirmation of a few more, I have begun to notice the tragic fall that claims so many promising couples.

So often, by the very nature of giving yourself to someone, we find ourselves morphing into a strange version of who we once were and quickly become unrecognizable to those closest to us.

I have watched many a friend try to delicately balance the task of investing in the desires and interests of the people they care about and taking time to invest in sports or their significant other's family or their friends. Soon, through weeks and months of movie nights, homemade dinners, trips home, and the up and downs of everyday life, they find themselves spending all of their free days and hours together as a couple, and fading into the vacant and resentful shadows of their friends' mind.

Soon, by default of loneliness, they end up with only one another, best friends and soon-to-be worst enemies, victims of confined spaces and few confidants. They soon find themselves weighing the positive against the negatives, and finding that the bad outweigh the good. As seasons change, and the warm and nostalgic feelings anchored in the summer and fall months turn to frozen and drawn-out days of winter, passions turn cold and once hopeful and bright visions of the future dissolve into tears and heartache.

If I had to give any advice to any person younger than me entering the throes of a new relationship, I would tell them to keep as much of themselves as possible and to constantly remind themselves of their own dreams and desires.

If I had to give any advice to any one of my friends who found themselves suddenly alone, I would tell them to rediscover themselves, to seek out their undiscovered dreams and their forgotten futures.

The person who falls in love with you falls in love with the person you are; all of you, all of your dirty, and shameful past. All of the bad parts and the good parts and the ugly parts and the beautiful parts. All of the embarrassments and the triumphs and the late nights that turn into early mornings spent revealing secrets.

Be who you are, all of you; be the girl that likes to drink and party and dress up with her friends; be the guy that takes an afternoon to himself, if to do nothing more than beat his score on "Call of Duty." Be the girl that needs to eat a whole cheese pizza and burn through three seasons of "Gossip Girl." Be the guy that escapes away to a weekend in Vegas with the bros; be the girl that encourages him and books her own fabulous weekend.

Invest in yourself and your independence and the things that make you unique. As these words come out of my head I know they sound cliche and stale and covered in fan-fare; but, ultimately, the happiest you can be is when you love yourself and someone loves the you that you love.