Over the years, I have experienced a lot of different times where things didn't necessarily go the way I had planned. Whether that be manifested in ways such as losing a loved one, battling health issues, or bombing an exam— each situation left me feeling discouraged. Whenever something like this would happen, my first instinct was to complain about all of the negative aspects of my life. Isn't it funny that the moment one bad thing happens, we tend to let it manifest into a million other “problems”?
If we continuously sit on these negative aspects of our life and let them consume us, then we will never feel satisfied with what we have. You will constantly be searching for something “more”, instead of appreciating what is right in front of you. For example, say you had just gotten a test back in a class at school. You had spent countless hours studying in order to make sure you did well. The test was a lot harder than you had expected, and covered some material that you hadn't quite understood. Say you got a D on said test, and that it had dropped your overall grade down as well. Now I’m not going to sit here and tell you that you aren't allowed to be upset, because I know that I always feel disappointed after I do poorly on an exam. But, lets look at how someone who practices thankfulness might look at the situation.
Okay, so you get the test and see that you didn't do so well. Some might immediately get upset, angry, and self-criticize. We are often hardest on ourselves, but have you ever stopped and wondered, why? First of all, lets recognize that you didn't just wing this test. You took the time to study and ask questions, so one aspect you can be thankful for is that you now have a reference point and can learn from your mistakes. Another thing to be thankful for is that you woke up that morning to take this test. You are living, breathing, and functioning adequately enough to walk down to a classroom and apply your knowledge to help further your education.
If we take a step back for a moment, we can see that most situations that we take for granted are often luxuries for someone else. Many families don't have enough money to send their children to school, or maybe a student had recently gotten in a car accident and would love to be participating in a classroom, but physically it’s just not possible for them. Do you kind of see where I am going with this?
In moments of disappointment, where something maybe didn't go in your favor, it is often our default setting to immediately look at life through a pessimistic lens. However, when you practice replacing those initial thoughts with little affirmations of thankfulness instead, you will begin to see some pretty amazing changes in your outlook. I will admit, it does take some time and practice to replace your “attitude with gratitude”. (ha!) It will feel uncomfortable, and your friends will probably ask you why your so cheerful all of a sudden, but I promise you that it is worth it. One small thing you can try is to write down five things you are grateful for, every day. Doing this will take less than two minutes, but will have such a lasting impact on your perspective throughout that day. It is also a great way to hold yourself accountable, because you will be able to look back on specific moments and recognize just how much you have to be thankful for.
I know that the everyday stresses of life can cause us to dwell on things that we wish we could change. But our outlook is truly just a mental thing, and you would be surprised at how much power that we actually have over our thoughts. Practice replacing thanklessness with gratitude, and you will begin to see the world in a whole new light.
Xo,
Noelle
