Everything could be good. Everything could actually be great.

We could be hanging out. We could be texting each other all day and all night. We could be partying together, planning trips together, or even practically living with each other.

But no matter how good it might be going, there will alway be that one part of me that will be in fear. I will always live with the fear of you leaving, no matter how good everything might be going. No matter how much you might promise me you'll never leave, there will always be those deep roots in my mind that will tell me not to believe the words that you speak.

It's happened in the past. It still happens. Why won't it happen now?

There are so many reasons why I've lost people. Distance. Loss of contact. Fighting. The list goes on...

But the worst ones are the ones that just simply drift away. No cause, no root of the problem... they just seem to disappear.

And that possibility never leaves my mind. I'll always think about it. Even when we are out together having the time of our lives, there will always be that dark part of my mind that tells me that this isn't forever. That this might be fun, but it's temporary, and that one day you'll move on and find someone who can have even more fun with you, leaving me in the tracks of our friendship, alone and confused.

So yes, I do value my friends. Yes, I do appreciate and love every single moment that I spend with them. But there will always be that part of me that will play devil's advocate. There will always be that part of me that tells me that this happiness, this fun, and this joy isn't forever.

There is that part of my mind that tells me that all good things eventually come crashing down.

But there is also a part of me that hopes I'm wrong.