One of the hardest things I have learned to deal with is change. But as I am getting older, I have come to realize that change is not all that bad.

What makes it difficult to deal with change is our fear that things will be different than what we are used to. The fear of the unknown. We are uncomfortable with the idea of adjusting to anything new because we are used to what we know. It’s comfortable.

But looking back at the last 21 years, not everything has ever actually remained consistent in my life. Not my family, not my living situation, not school, and definitely not all the people in my life.

Five years ago, my family dynamic drastically changed. My life consisted of the picture perfect family in our beautiful, light blue home, on the water in Lighthouse Point where my room was the size of my current apartment now. Within a year, my world had made an 180-degree turn… twice. My parents went their separate ways, I transferred to a different high school as a sophomore and had two different houses I was going back and forth from. One was my Father’s gorgeous condo on the beach on Atlantic and A1A and the other, my Mother’s cozy home right next to Commercial Beach. I didn’t adapt very well at first, it’s not easy transitioning into such a different lifestyle when everything was so consistent for 16 years. I had to learn to accept that the Mother that raised me my entire life, my best friend, was no longer the person I knew. And five years later, I can say that I still have not familiarized myself to this new person in my life.

But I learned from it, and I grew from it. We all did, because this was a change that could not be prevented. We don’t choose what happens in our future, we can only control how we react to it. Looking back now, after these last five years, this drastic change actually turned out to be one of the best things that could have happened to me because I grew to be a different version of myself, and it was for the better. My sister grew up to be the strong, intelligent, beautiful young girl that she is and I couldn’t ask for a better relationship with my unconditionally loving, understanding, and dependable Father. This life event that we went through did nothing but help us to figure ourselves out and help us develop a closer relationship during the process.

Florida is the 5th state I have lived in, and each time I moved from a different state I didn’t like the idea of leaving what I had to already teach myself to be comfortable with. But coming to think about it, I never had a problem adjusting. I moved out of my Dad’s place when I turned 18 to go to college in Boca Raton, got a full time job and made some life-long friends. A year later, my father and sister moved to Dallas and then a year after that, Boston. Even when they moved to Boston, I had to to accept the unfamiliar city as my new second home. My family moving from Florida was another change I had to learn to accustom myself with. I missed not being able to drive fifteen minutes south to have dinner with my family or just pop in and snuggle into bed with my little sister in the middle of the night. But because of all my past events, my Father and I agreed that I had some sort of stability for once in my life, and he respected the fact that I didn’t want to leave what is now my life in Florida.

Aside from the changes in living situations and family dynamics, friends and loved ones are just as hard to deal with when it comes to the idea of change.

Friends come and go. It is mainly because people change due to the fact that they have gone through their own struggle in life that leads them to be a different version of themselves. And sometimes, that kind of change is more difficult to adjust to than others. That’s something I have learned to accept a while ago. As I get older, I’ve realized that friendships are more stable due to the maturity factor that we didn’t have when we were younger, and the ability to communicate and understand one another. But it doesn’t mean that everyone is meant to be in your life forever. Sometimes we have to find the limit with certain relationships, and as hard as it is to let go, most of the time it is for the best. Once the trend begins of stressing over relationships, it strikes a red flag. Your friends and significant others aren’t supposed to make you feel anything but positive energy, if that’s not the case then they don’t belong in your life. And that’s where the idea of comfort plays a huge part. I have seen it with myself and many other people, that we have a hard time cutting the negative loose because we are too comfortable. With friends it is hard to let go because either we fear they know too much about us and the thought of betrayal and doubt in trust comes into mind; Or because the idea of how long the person has been in your life and the things they have done for you is taken into consideration. But that should never be enough to keep someone that makes you unhappy more times than others, around in your life.

When it comes to relationships, there can be as much fighting and making up, but at the end of the day it is all going to add up, and sometimes you just have to go your separate ways. We go back to our significant others for one of the few reasons. Either, that is someone that has been with us for a very long time and we feel that our loved ones know us inside and out, meaning we are once again, comfortable our significant other in every aspect there is. Or, we are afraid of moving on because there is the fear of not finding someone else that will love us or someone else won’t accept us for our flaws.

Love is much more difficult to find than a new friend who will actually stick by your side, but that should never be the reason to hold you back from letting go of the toxicity in your life. Life is too short to be unhappy due to the fear of change.

Things are always changing around us. It’s what keeps our world going and makes it more interesting. We may not be used to it at first, but with the right people and energy around you, no change will matter because they will help you get through it. Grow, learn, and make the best of the changes around you, don’t let the idea of it scare you. Embrace it.

Word of Advice: Don’t be afraid of letting people go. Nobody deserves anything else in this world than to feel that the only people in your life are those that will bring you up, make you laugh and only want the best for you.