Today, I got "the look." And I'm almost 100 percent sure I am not the only person in the world who has gotten "the look" before. I am also not going to insult anyone's intelligence here by saying that I have never given anyone "the look." Before I go on, let me explain what I mean.
As a student, have you ever worn inappropriate clothes? (Ladies, have you worn a pair of shorts that you felt comfortable for the heat yet others didn't think so? Men, have you ever accidentally sagged your pants and had others judge you?) As a driver, have you ever accidentally pulled forward too far to have your head be in the way of incoming traffic? I'm rapidly running out of examples, but between those two, you must know what "look" I am referring to. It is the condescending look. It is the look that questions, "What are you doing?" through the eyes. It is the look that judges you before they even know you. However, that isn't a big problem. The biggest problem is the gender disparity between the looks allowed.
As a (relatively new) driver, I am still learning the rules of the road (I do not mean the official rules. I mean how far I should pull out to an intersection before it becomes too far, etc.) and I definitely get a ton of "looks." But when has it become OK for men to give women the look, but not the other way around?
Not going to lie, men and women have equal opportunity to drive in our society (at least within the developed countries), so I want to believe men and women have equal access to the road. But in the amount of drivers I have offended that are women and men, only the men have ever given me "the look." Why can't women freely give people "the look"? In the few times I have gotten "the look" from women, they weren't even "the look." They were the "oh-dear-I-hope-she-knows-what-she's-doing" look. If I am truly going to be judged for my driver's skills, I do not just want the men to judge me. I want equal treatment.
And this doesn't just apply to the road. It applies to life, as well. Why can't women be more open about their opinions? Why can't women be able to speak up?
I know some of my fellow Smithies will say this: "But we can! We just need to be confident." Fine, but can we really exercise that confidence in the real world? Can we truly be just confident and speak up for ourselves without the fear of being judged? Without the fear that we are wrong?
With all these unanswered questions, I only know one thing to be correct: Women are human, too. We are entitled to our own opinions, our own judgments, and we can give "the look" whenever we want (as long as it is warranted). Because in a world where women are slowly but steadily gaining equity, someone needs to start exercising that very equity that has been so bravely fought for. Otherwise, we would not be able to face women like Rosa Parks, Eleanor Roosevelt and our own mothers. They are the women who have fought so hard and bravely for what we have today. They are the women who have fought for our free speech and our right to give "the look."
