The Dawn of Dad Hats:

In what I can only describe as a mixture of a massive lighting strike and impeccable timing, a new phenomenon is upon us all. It shot out of the sky and attached itself to everyone's head. The phenomenon comes in multiple colors with various letters or graphics, but all have one thing in common. They all have a curved brim.

I do not know how it happened, and if someone claims they do they're lying. Yet here I stand before you, and I triumphantly say it is cool to wear curved hats with straps on the back once more. I blame Kanye because it's his fault everyone looks like a camel with holes in their clothes so it's gotta be his fault everyone is stealing there old man's caps from his closet. Now before I go on I must admit, I'm a bit bitter. I wore curved brim hats for years, and never got a sliver of credit. Now I'm not a purist, mind you. I wore snap backs, fitted's, and everything else in between with the best of them. I even had a group of friends over a year ago start saying "bent bill gang!" whenever someone wore a dad hat. I've always had a soft spot for bent bill hats. I'll stand by this even a year or two from now when Kanye or Bieber start wearing bandannas or visors and make them all cool again. Don't pretend like you didn't think visors were dope as ever when one of the NSYNC guys wore them or Eminem rocked one in one of his church banned videos. Anyway, I digress, dad hats are back and I'm pumped.

These hats are far more versatile and acceptable than any other form of hat. You can rock them on the golf course, at the local watering hole, to church if you so dare, the club, and even business events. Your CEO who never gave you the time of day? Rock a straight heat Dad Hat you picked up from the mall to that business luncheon, and he'll respect you more than that girl in 5th grade who dumped you two days later after confessing to loving your best friend. You'll get a pay raise and a promotion for wearing that hat like a true dad. He'll whip his out of his back pocket, and you'll both hit the streets being best buds and making money. Don't take my word for it, go try it yourself.

Dad hats are the cream of the crop. Anyone can wear them. A girl with a million Instagram likes and pretends she lives in LA rocks the dad hat. Dudes who only wear Jordan's or Sperry's rock dad hats like it's nothing. A girl who does ballet, fishes, hates showers, and is vegan? She can rock a dad hat. A dude who dyes his hair to coincide with the weather, wrestles bears, eats raw tar, and only wears pink t-shirts will rock a dad hat, and steal your promotion. The point I'm making is this: dad hats are back, so jump on the bandwagon train and pay your ticket price which is that of one dad hat perched on your head at time of entry.

P.S. A dad hat is that of style which your father or father figure may wear to protect himself from the rays of sunlight that protrude our atmosphere. They generally come with a curved brim and an adjustable strap on the back. Occasionally they are fitted and those are acceptable.