Something truly bizarre is happening across the country. In many areas there have been numerous sightings of creepy, evil-looking clowns lurking about. Why we are suddenly experiencing a clown apocalypse is beyond me, but nonetheless it has grown to a concerning size. While it is not technically illegal to dress up like a clown and hang out in the woods, there have been reports of clowns following people, luring children, and even a few stabbings. Sightings and threats have even caused some schools to take action for the safety of their students. This unusual epidemic has people feeling like they are living in a Stephen King novel.
Clown paranoia has spread like a disease across the nation, especially with Halloween fast approaching. It would seem that many people have resolved to deal with the clown issue themselves, following a path of vigilante justice.
With these clowns feeding off of the paranoia and publicity, Halloween has become a point of worry. If you were thinking about being a clown for Halloween, you should probably reconsider. While Halloween is a prime time for potential clown attacks, many people will be on clown look-out. For your safety, I recommend not choosing a clown as your costume this year. I also recommend travelling in groups, especially at night, in case you do run into one of the creepy and dangerous clowns. Have mace and/or a taser with you, and 911 on speed dial. And no matter what, don’t walk alone. That’s what people do in horror movies, and look how they end up.
To anyone with coulrophobia, this clown apocalypse must be hell on earth. These clowns have brought us back to 1692 when paranoia of witchcraft plagued the town of Salem so severely that it led to the executions of twenty people within just over a year. Whether or not there actually were/are witches is a matter of personal belief, but these clowns are very real, potentially very dangerous, and are instilling in the American public a very similar hysteria. There have even been hunts already.
On October 5th, nearing midnight, I heard a large group of people outside my dorm room window. I later found out that it was a group of students out on a clown hunt, after hearing rumors of a sighting. To our knowledge, the hunting party did not find any clowns, but the presence of a hunting party was enough to plant worry into many students. I thought small town Alma, Michigan would be safe from this madness. I was wrong. Nowhere is safe.
As much as I dislike to dignify the attention-seeking clowns with an article, there is still a much present danger when it comes to them. Threats have been made on social media from clown groups, naming areas that they plan to overrun. These clowns like to toy with the fear and hysteria they cause, but fear turns people violent. All I can say is please, be smart, and be safe.
