When you left us my world was destroyed. All the time I get told "you are so strong" but they do not see me break down when I realize the many changes I have had to make. My whole life it was no secret that I was a tomboy and it was simply because I was a Daddy's girl. Anything he was doing, there I was following acting as if it was possible for me to do as well. Even though multiple times I asked to play football just like him he told me that was a sport for boys, so that dream was given up on and instead he eagerly taught me all about the game. So what does a girl do when she loses her daddy and hero at only 20 years old? She does not even know but every day a new change comes around and it hurts but it must be done because if I know one thing, he would want me to keep going and succeed.
1. You begin to talk about any sporting event to anyone that will listen.
A change like this to some people more than likely will not mean much, however, for me this was so important. From the time sports began for me, whether I was playing or not, my Dad and I always had conversations about what went wrong and what went right. Now that it is football season everything is so different and it hurts a lot more than I was prepared for.
2. No longer do I get to see how a man should treat a woman every day.
Everywhere there are posts and pictures from people that say "relationship goals" however none of them ever saw how my Dad treated my Mom. Growing up I always told myself that was what every girl deserves to find a man instead of settling. Now that you are gone just know I will not settle for less and that because of you, I know I am a queen who needs a king to treat me like one.
3. Any Beatles song has a totally different meaning to me now.
Everyone that knew you, knows just how much you loved The Beatles. Almost every Christmas since we were old enough to pick out the present for you ourselves you always received something with The Beatles on it or another album as if you already did not have every single one of them. I remember how you taught Courtney and me every word to "Yellow Submarine" when we were younger and we made you play it every day.
4. My wedding day will not go as I planned when I was a little girl.
Every little girl dreams of her wedding day and her daddy walking her down the aisle to the man of her dreams, the one she prayed for. Now who am I supposed to get to walk me down the isle and give me away? This will be a difficult day to endure as I also will not have the customary Father-Daughter dance that I have always loved watching. All I know is my Dad will be there in spirit and I will know it. I will make sure to save him a seat!
I love and miss you, daddy!
