Flashback a few years. I was completely head over heels in love.He was sweet, charming, kind, funny and a million other great things. In my mind, we were "perfect". I spent all the time I could with him and when I wasn't with him I was thinking about him. I thought no one could ever make me as happy as he could. I was closer to him than I had been with any other guy before him. We fought and argued like every other couple, but the good always outweighed the bad.
Until it didn't. We broke up.
To say I was devastated doesn't even begin to describe how I felt. Looking back now, I'm able to see that I took it harder than I should have. At the time, it seemed like the worst thing that had ever happened. I went back and forth between feeling like it was the right thing to feeling like I had made the biggest mistake of my life. I was hurt and didn't see a light at the end of the tunnel. Screw the tunnel I was in a hole with no way out. As with most things, time passed and things started turning up. I changed my perspective and started focusing on what I did have going for me. I was selfish for the first time in a very long time. I spent the summer with my friends but most importantly myself. That was the summer I learned the true meaning of "me time" and just how important it is.
I started to see my break up as an opportunity rather than a heartbreak. I no longer had to worry about someone else, their opinions, actions, and reactions or anything for that matter. It was kind of a turning point for me. I decided to figure out what I wanted in a significant other and my expectations of them. I set standards for myself and mindset that I would not settle for anything less than those standards. I learned to do things for me and not someone else. It is completely possible to have a healthy relationship and still be independent.
My break up was so much more than just that. It was a life lesson as cliche as that is. It helped me to realize who I am and what I wanted from life. It wasn't an overnight thing by any means. Honestly, there were still random nights in the midst of me feeling so strong and as if I had moved on where I still wondered if it was a mistake. It took time for sure.
I don't think a breakup has to have certain qualities to be a turning point break up. Each and every one of them could be. It is what you make it. If you wallow and never get out of the self-pity you lose the opportunity. Everything happens for a reason so why not make the worst situations into the best stories?
