There are days when red wine gets spilled over the white tablecloth of your life and the most reasonable thing to do is scrub and scrub until the stain seems to no longer be alive. There are days when there are anchors chained to your legs, and the simple act of walking feels equivalent to the aftermath of a 20 mile marathon. There are days we know how to cope, there are days we must learn how to.
There is no cure for depression. Nobody steps into such a deep realm expecting a quick recovery, and yet for some, after a while, the light at the end does become visible. It is an experience unspoken of - because of how differently it affects everyone. There isn't a perfect method that works for everyone, and there is no magic prescription medicine that can create instant change without being a catalyst for exhausting side effects.
The truth behind recovering lies within environment and self-manifestation. Help, motivation, and outlets are vital. I, for one, am extremely aware of how difficult depression makes daily activities. You're swallowed by a lack of appetite and the pessimistic outlook that shows up at your front door without invite over stays its welcome. The truth? Healing is layers. Healing is time. It is not linear.
finding an outlet
The most radical thought someone can have is equating isolation with redemption. It is not about who you decide to "cut off" or free yourself from all the time. Most people don't have the luxury of just leaving their depression or its source behind. It's about what you can find refuge in when things get hard to overcome. Practicing positive outlets can be done by just about everyone.
I've always been artistically inclined. Everything that had to do with creating using different mediums -whether it was paint or instruments- fascinated me to no extent. When I found myself with no other escape I turned to an alternate reality created with color. I've found that is a common idea.
For you, or anyone, it does not have to be the same thing. Your outlet can be hanging out with friends, dancing, drinking coffee, watching your favorite t.v. show, outdoor activities, there is no limit.
Growing in a predominately Hispanic city and a Hispanic household, I've taken into account how many times I see people who are struggling with depression or any other mental illness and are too afraid to ask for help, because all they're told is "it's all in your head", "depression isn't real", "it'll go away" and most commonly, "just think happy thoughts". It's been proven time and time again that depression is a chemical imbalance of the brain, and just thinking "happy thoughts" does not help everyone overtime.
The other side of the spectrum involves those who don't believe in treatment or getting help for the same reasons. Learning how to de-stigmatize therapy has been a major step in many people's lives changing for the better. It does not make one weak, and it sure does not make anyone less capable.
don't blame yourself
The sanctuary of the mind with chronic depression isn't one with walls, it is realizing you lack self-assurance and deciding to find it. That alters within everyone. Whether you find truth behind the saying "everything happens for a reason" or not, we can all agree that we are not completely in control of what happens to us. There is not always reason, and there is not always fault within yourself either. Healing is acknowledging that you cannot let past events find a home in your head or your heart.
If you blame yourself more than likely it was not you who conditioned yourself to believe that, but the memories that haunt you. You and I are more than a brain with the weight of the world sitting atop us. Give yourself room to grow. Cry about it. Write about it. Talk about it. Do not take it out on yourself if you know you have healing to do.