Anxiety is more than worrying. It's like being caught in a rain storm where your umbrella keeps turning inside out. You have a glimmer of hope that the wind will subdue and rain will slowly turn from a downpour to a calm dribble but in the end, you still get drenched. Sure, there are triggers such as waiting rooms or sensory overload. But sometimes, it's just an overwhelming feeling that overtakes your body. Your body doesn't feel like it belongs to you. Every single thing that could go wrong echoes in your head. If it gets bad enough, you enter into an anxiety attack. Your body shuts down and you're left shaking, hysterically crying and sometimes, you don't even know why.
Now, let's add another human into the mix. Being in a relationship with someone who has anxiety isn't easy. Period. Anxiety brings such discomfort to the brain and causes constant confidence issues. You can't help but listen to the questions your mind throws in your face.
- “Did I say something wrong?”
- “Are they mad at me?”
- “Am I texting them too much?”
- “What if I'm not good enough?
- “Are they going to leave me
because my anxiety is too much to handle?”
But now, think of the best possible outcome of a relationship. Your significant other learns your triggers. They learn what calms you down and they don't mind telling you multiple times a day they won't go anywhere. They won't leave you. They understand that sometimes, you just break down for no reason and they stay by your side until the rain passes. They run their fingers through your hair and whisper comfort in your ear when you're midst attack. They always make sure you go to sleep knowing how loved you are. They are everything you ever thought you didn't deserve. They go above and beyond to give you unconditional happiness.
They may not understand how the small things they do make such a huge impact. Saying “thank you” isn't even enough to describe how much their love and time means to you, but sometimes, you just need a place to start.
- Thank you for your patience.
- Thank you for your constant reassurance.
- Thank you for your shoulder.
- Thank you for knowing my anxiety doesn't define me.
- Thank you for helping me push my limits.
- Thank you for being my biggest supporter.
- Thank you for calming me down when I ugly cry.
- Thank you for always having my best in mind.
- Thank you for being understanding.
- Thank you for putting up with me when I'm stubborn about the reasons of my attacks.
- Thank you for always making sure I fall asleep knowing how loved I am.
- Thank you for never failing to let a day go by without telling me how beautiful I am.
- Thank you for your compromises.
- Thank you for listening when it feels like the world is crashing in.
- Thank you for learning the signs of when an anxiety attack is coming.
- Thank you for the back rubs, cups of tea and the sound of your heart.
- Thank you for talking about our future as a perfect distraction.
- Thank you for whispering the sweetest sighs in between the sobs.
- Thank you for loving me when I thought I couldn't be loved.
- Thank you for the happiness I feel when I think of you.
Finally, thank you for coming into my life and loving every part of me. For loving the good, the bad and everything in between. Because of you, I believe in me but most of all, I believe in us.