We All Know Someone Who Can't Take A Compliment

We All Know Someone Who Can't Take A Compliment

Sit down, you're not being humble.

The power of accepting a compliment is something that many people believe they know how to do but in fact, they do not. It is a power that has more meaning behind it than we realize. I think we all know one person who simply CANNOT take a compliment.

People believe that they are being humble if they reject, decline, or negate a compliment but actually, they are just being straight up rude. As someone who likes to toss out “yaaaas queens” and “slaaay my life bish” to my friends in real life or on social media, I lately have been having a hard time trying to stomach people rejecting kind words and decided to write about it.

My freshman year of college I went to this guest speaker Marian Jordan Ellis’s event “Girls Night Out”. I didn’t really know what to expect when going to this event I knew she was a Christian author and speaker who has written several books as well as hosts a conference every summer.

So, knowing at least that much I went and was excited to hear what she had to say. Marian brought up this very important topic of self love and she specifically used the example of rejecting compliments to emphasize our lack of self love. She talked about how rejecting, negating or even ignoring compliments does more damage than just accepting it.

This intrigued me as I had done this so many times in the past and had friends who did it as well.

During Marian’s event, she brought up the snowball effect of self deprecation bringing attention to the behavior girls engage in when one starts talking badly about themselves. You know exactly the situation, where one girl says something negative about herself and her friends will say “omg no you’re perf I wish I was as (compliment) as you are instead I’m just (degrading comment about self). Then in response to that the original friend does the same thing until you literally have an avalanche of self doubt and negativity.

We all know the feeding frenzy we get on when we start talking bad about ourselves and when we do it with others it just gets worse.

Once she recognized this behavior with her own friends, Marian decided to change things. When her friends would say horrible self-deprecating comments about themselves she would make them say three nice things to undo the bad they had just done.

While it seems a little extra, I really appreciated her going out on a limb for her friends because she eventually had them in a routine where they would stop their negativity because they knew what her response would be. This led to some just going straight into three nice things after their negative speech before she could even ask them to.

Incredible, right!

I think it is important not only to accept the compliment for yourself and really treasure the kind things people want to say to your face about you but also consider the other person.

It takes a lot for some people to step out of their comfort zone to compliment another person especially a stranger. When someone does step up to compliment and you reject for their kindness then you’ve not only hurt yourself by denying it but also hurt them by rejecting it.

Don’t come at somebody for trying to be nice to you. This excludes catcalls because those are not done with intentions of kindness that is just a form of harassment. However, a genuine compliment deserves a genuine thank you.

Also don’t feel like you have to hit the person up with another compliment they are prompting you for it they just wanted to say something nice. Exchanging another compliment or negating the given compliment is not protocol, just say THANK YOU.

A simple thank you is all you need to do.

Cover Image Credit: Becca Steele

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20 Small Tattoos With Big Meanings

Tattoos with meaning you can't deny.

It's tough to find perfect tattoos with meaning. You probably want something permanent on your body to mean something deeply, but how do you choose a tattoo that will still be significant in 5, 10, 15, or 50 years? Over time, tattoos have lost much of their stigma and many people consider them a form of art, but it's still possible to get a tattoo you regret. So here are 20 tattoos where you can't go wrong. Here are 20 small tattoos with big meanings. (But don't blame me if you still have to deal with questions that everyone with a tattoo is tired of hearing!).

SEE RELATED: "Please Stop Asking What My Tattoos Mean"

1. A semi-colon indicates a pause in a sentence but does not end. Sometimes it seems like you may have stopped, but you choose to continue on.

2. "A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor."

3. Top symbol: unclosed delta symbol which represents open to change. Bottom symbol: strategy.

4. "There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls."

5. Viking symbol meaning "create your own reality."

6.Greek symbol of Inguz: where there's a will, there's a way.

7. Psalm 18:33 "He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he causes me to stand on the heights."

8. 'Ohm' tattoo that represents 4 different states of consciousness and a world of illusion: waking (jagrat), dreaming (swapna), deep sleep (sushupti), transcendental state (turiya) and world of illusion (maya)

9. Alchemy: symbolizes copper, means love, balance, feminine beauty and artistic creativity.

10. The Greek word “Meraki” means to do something with soul, passion, love and creativity or to put yourself in to whatever you do.

11. Malin (Skövde, Sweden) – you have to face setbacks to be able to go forward.

12. Symbol meaning "thief" from the Hobbit. It was the rune Gandalf etched into Bilbo's door so the dwarves could find his house.

13. “Lux in tenebris” means “light in darkness.”

14. Anchor Tattoo: symbolizing strength & stability, something (or someone) who holds you in place, and provides you the strength to hold on no matter how rough things get.

15."Ad Maiora” is translated literally as “Towards greater things.” It is a formula of greeting used to wish more success in life, career or love.

16. A glyphs means “explore.” It was meant as a reminder for me to never stop exploring.

17. "Aut inveniam viam aut faciam," meaning roughly, "Either I shall find a way, or I will make one."

18. Lotus Flower. It grows in muddy water, and it is this environment that gives forth the flower’s first and most literal meaning: rising and blooming above the murk to achieve enlightenment.

19. The zen (or ensō) circle to me represents enlightenment, the universe & the strength we all have inside of us.

20. Two meanings. The moon affirms life. It looks as if it is constantly changing. Can reminds us of the inconsistency of life. It is also symbolizes the continuous circular nature of time and even karma.

SEE ALSO: Sorry That You're Offended, But I Won't Apologize For My Tattoos

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We've All Gone Through The Mia Thermopolis Pre-Makeover Phase, But Then We Glo-Up

Warning, mine is completely underwhelming.

"Glo-Up" is a term that refers to a person's physical transition after puberty.

To be honest with you, I don't use this term. I have finally started using "fam" and my boyfriend gives me a look as if he is begging me to stop.

Glowing-up makes me think of one thing and that is the beautiful transition from a schoolgirl into the princess that we all know and love.

Well, it made me think about how have I became my own version of the Princess of Genovia. I was granted my thin-framed brown glasses in the fifth grade and braces in the seventh grade. Puberty had run rampant and I choose to forget those pictures.

I debated on choosing a picture or hiding this horrible time in the archives of Facebook. Well, that was me at 13 in all my glory. I have no words, but I will let you take it all in.

Yep, that is me as a fresh ninth grader. I was only 15 in this photo. I had finally gotten contacts and my braces were removed. I was the happiest girl on planet earth. I will go ahead and warn you right now, I seriously don't look much different. But, thank God I stopped taking pictures like that.

Seriously, head tilted down while making my eyes look huge. It is as if a viewer is a giant person and I am a mere dwarf. Also, pencil eyeliner was not my friend.

Tenth grade came and I finally learned out to do eyeliner without stretching my eyelid out to oblivion. Please note the over-plucked, thin as a piece of paper eyebrows. I am not proud of it...

Oh, but my hair was amazing. Fingers crossed it actually grows out that long again without becoming a tangled mess.

As I came upon senior year, I was drawing in my eyebrows, which were still thin as a pen tip. Also, I thought laying down would make me look better because I could see my jawline in the picture. I guess that makes you more attractive as a senior.

Just a side note to anyone in their senior year, I promise you don't need a full face of makeup. Enjoy your skin, let it breathe. This is just a rare photo of my skin without thousands of red pimples.

Now here we are at age 20. I'm a rising senior in college and I put down the tweezer. You can judge, its fine. The eyebrow game is still very, very weak, but at least I finally have some to work with....right?

Maybe not so much a "glo-up" as I learned how to stop over-editing my photos and laugh a little more. Maybe, one day, people will stop asking me what grade in high school I am in.

Cover Image Credit: Maggie Riggans

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