I Decided To Take A Dating Hiatus To Better My Life

I think there comes a time in every college girl's life where they decide they need to figure their lives out before they let someone else in. Mine came during my sophomore years of college. I spent most of my first semester with someone who was really bad for me in more ways than one, someone who inspired a lot of articles and therapy later on. I went into my second semester with the mentality that the only man I needed in my life was God because a life with God is more fulfilling than some sophomore year fling.

I'm the girl who has been promised marriage by so many boys I have honestly lost count. I've been given rings, shown houses and apartments we can get, and some guys have even tried planning future weddings. I am the girl most boys like to bring home to their parents because I'm kind, loving (sometimes too loving), and I have a bright future ahead of me. There always comes a time, however, when they decide that they want a good time rather than a long time and leave without warning. I, with the abandonment issues I have, end up lost and shattered in the process all for just caring. I decided after the last one that I needed to give myself time to work on myself, get my life set straight, and focus on God's everlasting love because I needed the time.

One night not too long ago, I was sitting in one of my sorority sister's rooms and I was pouring out my heart to some of my closest sisters and friends, explaining my need to be single for the year. One of my sisters set me straight and explained how this could be so great for me because the way she saw it, my only flaw was that I love with my whole heart and most guys are not ready for that kind of love just yet. This solidified everything for me because what she said was true.

I realized in that moment how every breakup I have been through all boiled down to the fact that I care a lot and that is something I have been raised to do. I was raised in a household of people who love with their whole hearts and never regret it. I have always learned to show the people you love that you love them because you never know what tomorrow holds. I want to take the time to work on being more intentional in my life and to enjoy my college years while they last. I realized that I am in no rush for another ring or another wedding board on Pinterest. I am ready right now to think of myself and focus on my needs. I am ready to build up my friendships and close relationships without strings attached. I am ready to start thinking of me and being a little selfish and it is the best decision of my life.