It’s hard to hear your significant other is leaving town to go to a different college 5 to 8 hours away from you. You can’t do anything about it because you don’t want to hold them back. As the days go by without them you feel a little empty inside because they’re not there by your side every day like in high school.
You both become busy with schoolwork, you have different friend groups compared to what it was like in high school, and you both don't want to end up in the same faith as some long distance couples (breaking up). But you both know that when you both come home from college, it’ll be worth the wait. Here are some tips I found to be helpful when I was away from him.
1. Send them care packages.
Because I stayed in my hometown for college, I sent my boyfriend care packages full of things that would remind him of home. I sent cookies from Wegmans (a Rochester favorite), letters, and little gifts that reminded me of him. He told me that he was so happy to receive it and it helped him with his homesickness.2. Write letters.
We all have watched the Notebook or at least know about it. There was a part of the movie about Noah writing letters to Allie while she was away so that he feels he was still connected to her. Writing letters does help because you can put whatever thought you have of that person or tell them about your day.
If you want to save on postage stamps, try "Open When" letters. You can give them to your significant other so that when they need to read something from you in a specific situation, they have it right there in their dorm.
3. Skype/FaceTime
Thank goodness we live in the modern technology era! If you’re not the type to write letters or you believe your handwriting is on the can’t-read-it side, then video chatting with your significant other is the best way to go. It felt so good to Skype my boyfriend for the first time since we both moved into our dorms. Seeing his face and hearing his voice helped me get through the days without him by my side. We usually play a questionnaire game to learn more about the other (or we questioned what we know about each other) or we would talk about each other’s days.
4. Don’t think about the number of days you have left until they come home.
I found it helpful not to think about how many days I have left until I see my boyfriend. It made me miss him more by thinking like that. However, there are times when I wonder how many weeks I have until I see him which is better than thinking about the days.
5. If you have enough money, surprise them with a visit.
I’ll admit that when the days got tough and I needed him most, I would cry because the physical comfort you usually get from your boyfriend isn’t there. I would tell my boyfriend how much I missed him and sometimes we would both stare at each other with sadness in your eyes, missing each other and hoping that time will fly until we see each other again. It was the night of my second show for the musical The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee (shout out to Fisher Players) and I received a text from my boyfriend saying, call me when you finish your show.
I thought it was sweet that he wanted to talk and see how the show went, but to my surprise, he knew how the show went because he sat in the audience and surprised me by walking up behind me while I was taking pictures with my friends. I was so happy to see him for the first time in weeks and I (in all honestly) was crying for five minutes with his arms wrapped around me. Again, if you have the money to do this, I recommend it because being on the other side where I had no idea what was happening; it felt so good to see him.
6. Spend time with your friends.
Sometimes spending time with your friends is a great distraction from how much you’re missing your significant other. Plus, you get to tell him your adventures on Skype or in your letters.
7. Remain truthful and loyal.
I can’t tell you how many times in college where it would seem like things were going downhill for my relationship. Sometimes the distance was hard that I felt like this relationship couldn’t go on. I felt that maybe it would be easier to end it and save myself the heartbreak. But after talking about how I felt with my boyfriend, we both agreed that we will continue to try and make it work.
We made promises that assure that whenever the other person felt it was getting too hard, we would talk about. We both remained loyal and truthful. We talked through everything that bothered us and that’s really the key in any relationship. Communication is the key to success. That’s what I highly encourage. And if you’re wondering, I’m still with my boyfriend.
