Plain Jane Syndrome, the belief that there is nothing that makes you special, there’s nothing about you that draws people to you or makes you memorable. Having Plan Jane Syndrome doesn’t necessarily mean that you have the worst self-esteem in the world, but it also denies you the ability to see your strength because to you, all you are is simply average.
People might describe you as kind, you might have good grades, play on the varsity sports team, make a few people crack a smile occasionally, but to you, those abilities don’t make you anything special or anything that would make you a highly desirable friendship to have.
When people call you kind, all you think is “any decent person is kind.” You may be a straight A student, but it doesn’t come to you as easily as the girl that sits next to you in chemistry, you might play on varsity but you aren’t making headlines, and what about all the times you made a joke and no one laughed that happens way more often than people laughing.
Suffering from Plain Jane Syndrome makes social interactions anxiety provoking, as you feel you have to some conjure up joke after joke so that you are known as the funny girl, or be overly kind and giving, you have to do that one thing that makes you stand out, that will seal your position in the friend group, that your nothing special self is simply forgotten after you part ways because you did not have that moment of above ordinariness to make you stick in their memories.
This pressure to be everything but Plain Jane, to be everything but yourself, it takes away from being with others and makes you feel so forced, unnatural, and awkward.
Sadly, there is no magical pill to cure Plain Jane Syndrome. That doesn’t mean that you are destined to feel forgotten and mediocre your whole life. Like almost every solution when it comes to life, to cure yourself of Plain Jane Syndrome you just come to acceptance of who you are.
With the way that we idolize the star athlete, praise the Wiz Kid, or set Mother Teresa as the standard for kindness it is so easy to form the frame of mind that the only way to be of any significance in people’s lives is if you have that one thing that makes you significant. It is so easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you need to make yourself special to make friends, but, you make friends because they find something special in you.
How are people supposed to discover the real you if you are putting so much pressure on yourself to be anything but your “plain,” “boring” self? There are too many people in the world for us all to be making headlines and the best at everything. That doesn’t mean we aren’t making headlines in someone else life though.
You’re one good punch line could make others laugh for days looking back on it, you simple act of kindness could be what gets someone through a tough day, there are so many ways that being all that you are is making headlines in people’s minds even if you think that what you are doing isn’t.
So embrace who you are, because you aren’t a mind reader; you never know when something you do, that is completely and authentically you, is making someone else go “damn.”
