Back in the day, Heather Locklear was my fictional paramour.

In an otherwise lousy adaptation (on that note) of the Swamp Thing, a remarkably unique character I might add, Locklear was a magnificent specimen of feminine beauty. Alongside Heather was the likes of Cindy Crawford, Kathy Ireland, Karen Duffy, and so on.

I was a young adolescent experiencing a sexual awakening, so the figures on whom I targeted my early crushes were many. "Back in the day," the single most important criteria for being one of my crushes was, quite simply, to be hot.

Shocker, right?

I was a pre-teen, single, and ready to mingle. Not that I had any idea what that really entailed yet, but I was ready.

Jumping forward a few years (more than two decades), I still crush with the best of them.

The response isn't quite as when I was a wee lad with acne problems, but I still can't help but swoon just a little bit. For the briefest of seconds, I'll fantasize about what it might be like to be with them, in the biblical sense, obviously. I'll also imagine what it might be like walking through the park with them. Visiting a museum. Driving home from Thanksgiving Dinner at the fam's house. Even arguing about which comic hero is better. All the while observing (personally) all their known idiosyncrasies and discovering those of which the public is unaware.

The criteria from which I form my modern crushes still depends on how I perceive them, but with significantly less emphasis on their physical appearance.

Adjectives like "sexy" or "gorgeous" fall to the wayside as I not prefer "delightfully quirky" or "adorkable." A pretty smile goes far, but maybe that person is shallow, which is a very real possibility.

The stakes are higher if you're discussing celebrity crushes. I mean, how can you know the real Jennifer Lawrence, for example. Is she really a pizza hound, as she often portrays herself? Is Jessica Chobot really a gamer or is she just a pretty face in front of a camera? One disappointing tidbit or flaw, and you find your crush toppling down from that pedestal of lies.

Having a conversation with my fellow EMU Odyssey contributors provoked a sharing of crushes. Taking notes of both their crushes and some dialogue shared between us, I decided to create a list of some of more preeminent crushes of my peers. My goal? To share them with you!

My goal? To share them with you!

Arica

Our intrepid editor-in-chief counts among her crushes Adam Driver, Kit Herrington, Oscar Issac, and Orlando Bloom.

"Orlando Bloom," Arica shares, "was my first major celebrity crush."

Arica's own list was concluded rather quickly, but she had a few things to say in response to others' celebrity crushes.

Molly

Resident ginger and grad school (sniff) bound peer offers up quite a list of celebrity crushes. Imagining her growling animalistically as she lists them off, Molly's celeb crushes include A.J. McLean, Colin O' Dongahue, Chris Pratt, Chris Hemsworth (as Thor), Eric Dane, and Marky Mark (a.k.a. Mark Wahlberg).

Much to the chagrin of others, Molly expresses her renewed interest in Chris Pratt with, "especially now that he's single."

"Way too soon, Mol," Emily contributor cried out, referencing Chris Pratt's recently announced separation from wife Anna Faris.

On the subject of "Grey's Anatomy" star Eric Dane, Molly had this to say about him: "Mmmm. Silver hair on a sexy man is just...yummmmmm."

As a slighly silver-hair gentleman myself, I agree with Molly's sentiments.

Emily

Disapproving of Molly's Chris Pratt comment is Emily, who quite possibly the most substantial list of celeb crushes out of the entire EMU Odyssey contributor pool. They are Paul Rudd, Mark Ruffalo, Henry Cavill, Heather Ledger, Adam Scott, Jake Johnson, Milo Ventimiglia, Chris Hemsworth, Seth Meyers, Austin Nichols, and Rob Lowe.

"My boyfriend makes me watch superhero movies all the time and Superman is fineeeeee," says Emily.

Emily loves Adam Scott's "adorable" and "dorky" face, fellow contributor Chloe says his face reminds her of a "chipmunk mixed with a beaver."

"Kinda creepy," Chloe says while adding that Scott is "still kinda cute."

As exasperated as one can through text, Emily announces that Jake Johnson is a "beautiful creation," a point which sparked agreement from the supreme editor-in-chief Arica.

Of her other star crushes, Emily had much to say. Milo Ventimiglia is "hot as hell." She admits having a "weird thing for Seth Meyers." Cites Austin Nichols' grin as the reason for digging him. And Chis Hemsworth "in glasses" does it for her.

Hunter

Mr. Johnson offers up the names of Carried Underwood, Mila Kunis, and Chrissy Teigen.

"If I had to pick one," Hunter says, "probably Chrissy Teigen."

Hunter's crush drew several agreements, including the very author of this article (me).

Ashley

Ashley offered up a sole celebrity crush, and it's not hard to see how Ashlyn Harris would earn anyone's imaginative affections.

"I mean," Ashley says, "how could you not" adore her?

Chloe

"I can't believe nobody has mentioned Ryan Reynolds yet," Chloe says before immediately claiming Reynolds will forever be her number one crush.

"Real talk though," Chloe interjects. "Ryan Reynolds is enough to give you all the relationship and DILF goals you could ever need."

Yes, Ryan Reynolds was just referred to as a DILF. For those not in the know, a DILF stands for a "Dad I'd Like to F*ck." And Chloe just called him that. Like a boss. With no shame. Go, Chloe!

"A man being a good dad is one of the sexiest things ever," Molly contributed to the Ryan Reynolds adoration.

Tunde

Tunde jumps into the fray by offering up Gabrielle Union as his pick for celebrity crush.

"I still don't believe that's 44," states Tunde, referencing Union's undeniable good looks. Well, you could deny that she looks lovely, but you'd be wrong.

Meg

Meg has quite an expansive list, too, one that rivals Chloe's list of crushes. Topping the list is Robert Downey Jr., but Meg also has star-studded crushes on Jack Nicholson, Sebastian Stan, Emilia Clark, Chris Evans, John Boyega, Oscar Issac, Harrison Ford, and Jon Hamm.

"80s Robert Downey Jr.," Meg asserts, "is just as hot as now RDJ."

When asked about her unique interest in Jack Nicholson, Meg simply states, "it's the brows."

Meg shares that "Sebastian Stan from Captain America could cut in front of me at Target (which I take very seriously) and I wouldn't be mad."

Andy

Saving the best for last, it's time for me to share my celebrity crushes, although it changes from day to day and moment to moment. In no particular order, I crush on Lena Dunham, Jena Malone, Anna Kendrick, Natalie Dormer, Billie Piper, and a good few others.

Lena is so brazen and unapologetic that even when she bugs me, I still can't help but adore her.

When Natalie first hit the scene, she bugged the hell out of me. Not sure why, but fairly quickly I found myself appreciating her more and more. Whenever she graces the screen in film and on television, I swoon just a little bit. More than a little bit. And I'm really jealous of that apple in the gif above.

Well, that's about it. A few contributors failed to share, but I'm sure they have their own crushes. But enough about us, what about the rest of you? Who do you crush on? Is there one particular celebrity or star that tickles your fancy just right?