I've had glasses for almost 11 years now, so I would like to say I have had my fair share of experiences with four eyes. If you found that comment hilarious, this article is for you my friend. There are some things we partially-blind folks never get tired of hearing. Want a list? Don't worry; that's what I'm here for.
2. Nose sweat. Just. Lots. Of. Nose sweat.
Unless we take off our glasses every ten minutes to wipe our nose, our glasses will slip down our noses until we look like the librarian from "Monsters Inc."
"I'm watching you... Always watching," and if you didn't get that reference, we can't be friends.
3. "Can I try them on?"
What? No, do you just randomly go up to people without legs and ask them to try on their prosthetics? Stop it, you're weird.
4. Taking even a five-minute nap becomes the world's greatest struggle.
All I'd like in life is to not wake up blind. Is that too much to ask?
Not to mention, if we do try to nap with glasses on, they'll just slip off our ears...
5. Drinking a nice hot chocolate (or any other hot beverage) comes at a cost.
Foggy glasses for post-one minute after we drink it.
6. *Tries on glasses* "OMG, you're so blind."
What does that even mean? No. Stop scrolling, and someone comment below telling me what does "so blind" mean. Like is it there some sort of spectrum between 1-10 where if you're seven and above, you're "so blind?"
Let me make this clear, if you have 20/20 vision, no matter which pair of glasses you put on, everything will look blind to you because you have perfect vision (that, unfortunately, did not come with a perfect brain). Looks like common sense isn't very common.
7. Weather. Any weather.
Rain—wet glasses. Humidity—foggy glasses. Hot—sweaty nose (refer back to number two for further explanation).Cold—can't wear beanies unless we want tilted glasses. There's just no winning.
8. "How many fingers am I holding up?"
I have glasses, not a walking stick. I'm near-sighted, not blind. Chill out.
9. Watching 3D movies is an uphill battle all in itself.
For people without glasses who probably don't understand this, let me explain in one sentence.
Wearing two glasses at the same time is next to impossible.
10. "Wow, you should wear contacts more often!"
Wow! I don't recall asking for your opinion.
11. "Are they real?"
No, I just choose to make myself suffer. I choose to stumble over chairs and pillows as I get out of bed every morning and hunt for my glasses. I choose to take my showers completely blinded by fog as I struggle to differentiate between shampoo and conditioner. I choose to have a panic attack whenever I drop my glasses, forcing me to get onto my hands and knees so I can find them before someone's foot does.
So yeah. They're pretty fake.
12. Going to the beach or a pool? You better trust your seeing-guide with your life.
With your life. Your life.
14. "So, this means you're going to go blind one day?"
Let's take a break from sarcasm, shall we? Every single person's situation is different because everyone's eyes worsen at different times along with different numbers. Some people's eyes just stay at the negative number they've started at while others worsen over a period of time. Some people's eyes stop worsening at the age of 17 while others don't stop until the age of 26 or even later. Some people may just get LASIK to better their vision. My point is—it really depends. Not everyone is going to go blind.
Don't worry, not all of your friends are going to grow up to be a bunch of Stevie Wonder's (though... that would be pretty cool...).
15. Our yearly checkup with the eye doctor is like going on a successful three week diet. And then one-day binge.
Guilt. Guilt. Guilt for days. We have nothing to be guilty for because most of the time, our worsening eyes is not our fault. I know I speak for all us when I say the following two lines give us so much anxiety. So. much.
"Read aloud the smallest line you can see."
"Which one is better? This or this? How about this or this? *the optometrist says as they flips around the little lense thing-a-ma-bob*"
So. Much. Anxiety.