A few months back I watched a TED talk that has changed the way that I view kindness and compassion. Normally when I watch a TED talk I feel inspired for a few hours or maybe even a few days, but slowly the sentiment from the talk slips away. This talk was different though, and I have found myself thinking about this video fairly frequently over the last few months. This talk was by Abigail Marsh, and the talk itself was entitled, “Why some people are more altruistic than others." Who knew that some random TED talk, and one that I almost didn’t watch, would have such a lasting impact on me.

If I am being entirely honest, I wasn’t completely sure what altruistic meant when I went to watch the video. For anyone else who, like me, didn’t know what altruism is, it is defined as, “unselfish regard for or devotion to the welfare of others.” This sounds like quite a simple premise- to be kind to and care for other people without any personal gain- yet there is so much more to it than you may think. Although this video discussed altruism on a much larger scale, it allowed for me to spend quite a bit of time thinking about what it means to be altruistic, and how I myself can be better at it.

I try really hard to be a kind person. I think it stems from the basic understanding that we should treat others the way we would want to be treated. I love when people do nice things for me. That sounds so silly, but it’s true. When someone goes out of there way to do something for me that they could have easily not done, no matter how small it may be, it truly makes me happy. In turn, I try to pass this on to other people, and share a little bit of kindness with anyone that I can. Although I try to be kind and help others to the best of my ability, I still wouldn’t consider myself an overly altruistic person. I want to be though, I most certainly want to be. I think that is why this video may have stuck with me all this time, because it is something I can strive towards. But there is something I have begun to realize after quite a bit of consideration: I am not sure my motives are stemming from the right place. Is my desire to help others more about them, or more about me? As hard as I may try to have unselfish regard for others, I am still stuck in a phase of being too selfish. Selfish with how much I feel I can give, and selfish with my motives.

I think that in this day of age, there is often a thought that we need to be selfish to survive. People are often motivated by the idea that you have to protect yourself first, care for yourself first, and put yourself first in order for life to go the way you desire. To some extent, I do agree with this. I think you have to be at some level of stability to really help others. But I also think we rely too much on the idea that being selfish is the only way to get through life. I think we get caught up in the idea that we have to be selfish to survive, and we forget to consider everyone else and what they may need. I often get caught up in this mindset of selfishness, but this TED talk made a point that on the contrary, compassion is still extremely prevalent in this day and age. After some consideration, I find that to be very true; as much as people have selfish tendencies, they also have the ability to be deeply compassionate. Sometimes we may have to dig a little deeper for the compassion, but with a consciousness of how necessary compassion is, I do believe that people are able to find it within themselves when needed. Although it sounds simple to help others with no regard for oneself, it actually may require quite a bit of practice for us all.

I have started to admire people for the way they are able to care for others first. Maybe it’s because I have felt a great need for some kindness and compassion these last few months, and I received it from people who had no duty to do so. But after watching this TED talk and actively watching people live out altruistic behaviors, I am left feeling inspired. It has inspired me to find it within myself to be altruistic. It is such a simple concept: be nice to people and do not expect anything in return. I want to find it within myself to turn such a simple act into a common practice in my life.

I don’t want to come across as pretentious about this entire concept. I understand that we all have to behave a certain way just to manage our daily life. I just really, really love nice people. They make life so much better for us all. I think we could all benefit from adopting some altruistic tendencies, because it would certainly make the world a better place.