1. There's about 50 people who feel the exact same way you do. | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Life Stages

To My 9th Grade Self, I Wish You Would've Known These 4 Things

Advice I wish I could give my younger self and advice for others starting high school feeling the same way I did.

261
https://unsplash.com/@scottwebb
Scott Webb

In This Article:

"One.Two.Three." I stare out the window at the intimidating herd of strangers as I try to remember to breathe. In and out is a mantra playing over and over in my head. In the background of my overpowering thoughts, I hear a familiar, reassuring voice attempting to break through my own internal fears. It's my mother. "It's going to be okay! Plenty of other kids are new, its normal to be so worried!" I can tell that she is trying to reassure herself of that fact just as much as she is trying to reassure me.

The past three months of being homeschooled took me from being an outgoing, carefree kid to one riddled with stress that I could barely recognize. After the ninth time reciting my daunting new schedule in my head, I remind myself that it's just high school. I step out of the car, fidget with my shorts and try to look as confident as possible as I make a beeline towards the unfamiliar buildings. Quickly shuffling past excited freshman, I try to avoid eye contact with the curious glances.

I still haven't mastered the art of blending in, even with this being my fifth school in five years. I did master making new friends though. Or at least I thought. Something changed within me over the long summer. Worries and irrational fears started plaguing my mind until even the thought of telling a waiter my order made my heart beat like a racehorse and my mind spin, thinking about how I'd stutter.

The attention of the nearby students made me second-guess everything. "Why are they looking at me? Am I wearing the wrong thing? Will they hate me?" I shuffle as fast as I can towards the closest restroom and lock myself in the handicap stall. I set my perfectly organized backpack on the ground and start fidgeting with my hair and clothes and anything I could find while I critique myself in the mirror. I try to hold back tears as my breathing increases and the hyperventilating starts.

I contemplate calling my mother as the overwhelmed sensation continues to choke me. I know I'm being irrational and that only makes my thoughts worsen. A year ago, I would have no problem walking up to every person I saw and introducing myself. Now I'm confining myself to a bathroom with only my thoughts and fears to keep me company."


That is part of a paper I wrote five years ago for my freshman year English class, and reading it now makes me so sad that I ever felt like that. I thought that I was alone and everyone else was floating past without a care in the world. My anxiety often heightened my emotions and made things like starting a new school harder for me but I never considered that others were struggling as well.

I was inspired to write this article after talking to a group of kids about to start high school at the same school I went to. They told me about the fears and worries they have about being alone in a new place and it brought me right back to how sad I was freshman year.

I learned many things in high school that I didn't know going in. I worried about silly things that didn't matter and overthought everything before I started freshman year.

So, without further ado, this is the hard-earned advice I wish I could tell my younger self and advice for others starting high school feeling the same way I did.

1. There's about 50 people who feel the exact same way you do.

When I entered high school, I felt so alone in my stress over making friends and being "cool" that I was basically isolating myself. I looked at everyone around me and I thought they were all happy and transitioning into school way easier than I was. That almost put them on a pedestal in my mind which made it harder to talk to them. I've learned recently that in a new situation like that, almost every single person is worried about something. Remembering that makes people more approachable and can remind you that everyone's on the same playing field when it comes to the first day of school.

2. The friends you meet the first day of school don't have to be your friend by the last.

I went in thinking that I needed to find my best friend day one before everyone was grouped up and I was left behind. In actuality, that's so far from the truth, it's laughable. I watched so many groups of friends break up and splinter apart more times than I could count during high school, including my own friend group. The person you spend the first couple weeks hanging out with doesn't have to be your end all be all friend. It's okay if it doesn't work out and you slowly drift towards other people. That process of drifting away from friends used to scare me but now I expect it and accept it as a natural part of friendship.

3. Quality over quantity always.

This is pretty self-explanatory but I'm often surprised by how many people don't follow this common mantra. Pick friends who will always be there and don't waste your energy on those who just take from your life, instead of adding to it. It's as easy as that.

4. Don 't pay attention to social standings, they're irrelevant.

My last bit of advice I wish I could go back and tell myself is to ignore the cliques and the social hierarchy that comes with all schools. In elementary and middle school, I always gravitated towards the "cool" kids. It was fun to be a part of that crowd but I never felt like I was being myself. I felt like a walking talking persona. When I went homeschooled in eighth grade, my life came into focus and I realized everything I'd been doing wrong. I think the thing I'm most proud of doing in high school was avoiding that cliche mean girl group. I made a group of friends out of girls that I generally loved and cared about, instead of focusing on social status as I had in the past. High school will shape you into the person you will be for the rest of your life and it's best to have friends who push you to move in a positive direction and be the best version of yourself.

To all the kids about to start school, it gets easier. You will meet your best friends and learn so much about yourself. I entered high school scared and stressed and I left as a completely different person. My advice is definitely more than a little cliche, but it's what I wish I knew five years ago, going into highschool.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
an image of taylor swift standing center stage surrounded by her backup dancers in elegant peacock esque outfits with a backdrop of clouds and a box rising above the stage the image captures the vibrant aesthetics and energy of her performance during the lover era of her eras tour
StableDiffusion

A three-and-a-half-hour runtime. Nine Eras. Eleven outfit changes. Three surprise songs. Zero breaks. One unforgettable evening. In the past century, no other performer has put on an electric performance quite like Taylor Swift, surpassing her fans ‘wildest dreams’. It is the reason supporters keep coming back to her shows each year. Days later, I’m still in awe of the spectacle ‘Miss Americana’ puts on every few days in a new city. And, like one of Taylor’s exes, has me smiling as I reminisce about the memories of the night we spent together.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

These powerful lyrics remind us how much good is inside each of us and that sometimes we are too blinded by our imperfections to see the other side of the coin, to see all of that good.

82606
Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

The song was sent to me late in the middle of the night. I was still awake enough to plug in my headphones and listen to it immediately. I always did this when my best friend sent me songs, never wasting a moment. She had sent a message with this one too, telling me it reminded her so much of both of us and what we have each been through in the past couple of months.

Keep Reading...Show less
Zodiac wheel with signs and symbols surrounding a central sun against a starry sky.

What's your sign? It's one of the first questions some of us are asked when approached by someone in a bar, at a party or even when having lunch with some of our friends. Astrology, for centuries, has been one of the largest phenomenons out there. There's a reason why many magazines and newspapers have a horoscope page, and there's also a reason why almost every bookstore or library has a section dedicated completely to astrology. Many of us could just be curious about why some of us act differently than others and whom we will get along with best, and others may just want to see if their sign does, in fact, match their personality.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

20 Song Lyrics To Put A Spring Into Your Instagram Captions

"On an island in the sun, We'll be playing and having fun"

9706
Person in front of neon musical instruments; glowing red and white lights.
Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash

Whenever I post a picture to Instagram, it takes me so long to come up with a caption. I want to be funny, clever, cute and direct all at the same time. It can be frustrating! So I just look for some online. I really like to find a song lyric that goes with my picture, I just feel like it gives the picture a certain vibe.

Here's a list of song lyrics that can go with any picture you want to post!

Keep Reading...Show less
Chalk drawing of scales weighing "good" and "bad" on a blackboard.
WP content

Being a good person does not depend on your religion or status in life, your race or skin color, political views or culture. It depends on how good you treat others.

We are all born to do something great. Whether that be to grow up and become a doctor and save the lives of thousands of people, run a marathon, win the Noble Peace Prize, or be the greatest mother or father for your own future children one day. Regardless, we are all born with a purpose. But in between birth and death lies a path that life paves for us; a path that we must fill with something that gives our lives meaning.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments