As you get older, you probably think that there’s no such thing as “bullies” anymore. I mean, young adults no longer feel the need to pick on others, right? That’s what you would think, but it’s sadly not the case. Often times bullies just adapt. They continue to put down and threaten others; we often just don’t see it, or we choose to ignore it so that we don’t look uncool.
Personally, I never thought that I’d have to deal with bullies in college. I thought they were a thing of the past. I thought that in college everyone was mature enough to realize that everyone was human and that everyone feels the same emotions, but I was wrong. It breaks my heart that I was wrong.
It breaks my heart because my cousin was bullied. He was pushed around sometimes and made fun of. The worst part was that I could have done more for him. I should have been there for him sooner, but I wasn't.
On April 25th 2012, my cousin committed suicide. I had seen him that day. I hadn’t even gotten the chance to let him know how much I cared about him until it was too late. I was never the same again which was probably for the best. Unfortunately, it took a tragic event like this to make me change, but I would never again allow someone to be mistreated under my watch. I never again wanted anybody to feel the same way my cousin did that ultimately ended up causing him to take his own life.
Upon the arrival of the freshmen at my college, including myself, one boy stood out among the rest. He was tall, skinny and had really long hair. The addition of his beard caused him to earn the nickname, “Jesus.” I ended up having a class with this boy, and in there I noticed that he never changed his clothes. I knew this to mean that he probably didn’t like change. That’s probably why he didn’t cut his hair. Whatever the reason, I made it my mission to protect this boy from any harm, especially from my peers.
I often would try to get my friends to come sit with him. They would look at me and laugh. I began to lose my respect for them. They feared rejection from their peers more than they feared my rejection. It didn’t matter to me; I was going to make sure this boy never felt the way my cousin did. Rejection from my peers to me was nothing.
The strange boy walked into the cafeteria at lunch one day. I was sitting down with some friends and watched the scene unfold. A basketball player picked up his apple and threw it at the boy. Once one basketball player did it, and they all suddenly started to join in. They started making fun of him. They asked him to “turn their water into wine,” and if he would “do their homework” for them. They asked why he was so weird. They laughed at him to his face. I had had it. I stood up and walked over to them. I started laughing at them. I told them how pathetic it was for them to make themselves feel bigger by belittling another.
Suddenly, I wasn’t the only one standing up for this boy. Others came and stood with me and told the basketball players to stop. Some football players came and told them that if they had a problem with this boy that they would have to go through them. Immediately, the tone of the basketball players changed. They didn’t just agree to stop bullying the boy, but they also ended up building a strong relationship with him. They learned something from it. They learned that being nice to people is more important than looking “cooler” in front of your friends.
I learned something too. I learned that sometimes all it takes is for one person stand up and then others will join in. We as human beings need to be more aware of our surroundings and kinder to people. Reach out to the weird kid. Be a friend to someone who needs it. I promise you, that is more important than looking “cool.”
