Almost a year ago, I wrote an article with the same name. It had the same meaning and it will include some of the same words, however, what will be different this time is that there will be more passion, there will be more heart, and there will be more words of pain as I write this article.
The "R" word. No, I am not talking about respect, race, or romance, I am talking about the word retarded. My friends have used this word, my family has used this word, and I have even used this word. Every single time it is said, I want to scream.
It wouldn't be a scream in an angry way, it's a scream of acknowledgement. I want to shout at them to stop. Stop using the word. Do you actually have a valid reason to use the word? Do you even know what the word means? The technical term for retarded means being less advanced, sometimes typically used to describe the mental or physical being of a person with special needs.
When you use this word, nine times out of 10, you aren't actually using it to describe someone with a disability. Like stated above, you're probably using it to describe something that is crazy or maybe something that doesn't function adequately. This word is being used in a negative way, like when making fun of people. While you may not be saying this directly to a mentally or physically disabled person, the use of the word is still hurtful.
It never really registered in my head just how powerful the word was until I got older, until I started opening my eyes and realizing that this word can hurt even the ones I love. I have a cousin who is special needs and to know that if someone ever used this word around him or even used it to describe him, makes me LIVID. I had P.E in high school with the special needs class because they knew that that particular class was going to be able to help these children and would not make fun of them. A coworker of mine has adopted two children who are special needs. But guess what? They are not the "R" word. They are not NOT NORMAL. They are not handicapped children. These children are special. These children are normal. These children have feelings and by using this word, you hurt them.
We need to think about how we use this word. For example, you could be sitting with a friend eating lunch and that word slips from your tongue. While you do not think anything about it, a little red flashing light is going off in your friend's head. They are thinking, "Did they really just say that?" They ask you not to use that word, you joke about it and just laugh it off. I mean, it was just a slip of the tongue, right? But for your friend, that word sent a pain in their heart because when they get home, they have to take care of their sibling with special needs.
Whenever I hear people use the "R" word, I immediately ask them to not use the word. I ask them if they know the meaning of the word, and then I tell them why it offends me. However, it offending me should be the last thing you think about. It offending someone with a disability whether it be mental or physical is something you should think about. Think about all of the children who actually have special needs and do have a clear understanding of the world around them. Think about how many times they have heard this word and go home and cry.
This is NOT an article of me telling you to stop using a word because it MIGHT be offensive. This an article about me begging you to stop using the word because not only are you hurting yourself, but you are also hurting those who are around you. You are causing pain to someone with special needs. You are diminishing your own self by using this word. So, I beg of you, stop using the "R" word. Broaden your vocabulary and find something else to use because people with special needs aren't the "R" word, they are people. They are humans who require just a bit more love. They are humans who are more special to the heart than you and I. They are humans who need to be taken care of. They are humans who are brothers, sisters, cousins, uncles, and aunts. They are human.
So, I pledge each and every day that I, Jordan Privitt, pledge to end the "R" word and all of the negative connotation and pain it inflicts on those who have intellectual and developmental disabilities.
If you're still not sure when it's OK to say the "R" word, maybe it's time to listen to the 6.5 million people who have intellectual disabilities in the United States alone. Watch this four-minute video and stop using the "R" word.
