Participating in recruitment as a sister always makes me a little nostalgic for my experience as a PNM (Potential New Member). Going through the sorority recruitment process was terrifying. I was so worried about every little thing I said or did: did I have the right clothes, did I look and walk the right way, was I too awkward, did they like me, what if I didn't receive any bids at all? You know, all the normal PNM fears. Looking back, I’m very aware that although putting my best foot forward was important, whether or not my nails were polished or my hair was straightened versus barrel-curled was the least important thing I could have worried about. Recruitment is definitely on my list as one of the most insanely stressful and busiest weeks I’ve experienced. But it’s also worth it to have the opportunity to help my chapter to grow and to choose the individuals who will further its purpose. Here are some tips for my sisters and PNMs alike from a woman that’s been through it all.
To my first-time-recruiting sisters:
You can do this! Shine your light and be yourself. Relax; the PNMs are going to love you! Remember that conversations with PNMs are just like meeting 700 new friends!
Bring homework. You’ll have no time at home, and that time will be spent napping or massaging your feet. Trust me on this one.
TEA AND COFFEE. You'll be talking way more than usual and you won't be sleeping much. Caffeine will be your new best friend.
On that note, if you’re not talking to a PNM, rest your voice. Seriously.
Be prepared! Learn the songs, memorize the choreography, and for goodness sake, don’t wait until the day before to buy your outfits! Its not worth stressing yourself or the recruitment chair out.
Some PNMs will be rude. Smile and remember that you’re an ambassador for our sisterhood both on campus and and internationally. Represent us with charity and dignity. Every PNM should leave a party wanting to become one of us. And why wouldn’t she?
Our Leadership Council and Recruitment committee puts their heart and soul into making this process amazing. Not everything is going to go according to plan and we’re all going to be stressed. Have tolerance and breathe deeply. We’re all stressed but we’re doing the best we can. Show respect for your organization and the individuals you chose as leaders by doing all that you can to help and keeping a positive attitude despite how you might feel in the moment.
Be exciting! You have the opportunity to share how amazing our sisterhood is, and let the women you’re talking to know it! Don’t be afraid to get excited when talking to them! PNMs tend to reflect your attitude. If you’re bored, they will be too. If you get excited, so will she!
To PNMs:
We’re just as nervous as you are! I pinky promise. We’ve been preparing for this week all year. Relax. The system works, regardless of how crazy it may seem.
Don’t be that PNM who is rude to a specific organization just because you don’t think you want to be there. Those individuals are people with feelings, and deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, regardless of how much you don’t want to wear their letters. Besides, the Greek community is a pretty tight-knit bunch, and you’ll likely have to interact with sisters of other organizations, even after you find your home. Don’t make it awkward by being rude to them at the get-go.
Don’t be afraid to open up about yourself! I don’t mean telling your deepest, darkest secrets, but it’s easier to connect with someone once you know more about them. You’re going to introduce yourself and describe your major a hundred times (sorry about that). But you can also tell (or learn) deeper things about the individuals you’re meeting. After all, it’s called "values-based recruitment" for a reason. What are you looking forward to or afraid of? What are you passionate about? What values guide your life? Who are some of the most important people in your life? It’s great to make friends you can hang out with, but it’s even better when you can connect with them and talk about more than school and hobbies.
Don’t say things just because you think someone wants to hear them and don’t lie so that an organization will invite you back. We can tell and it’s awkward.
Be yourself and have fun! You’re meeting the women you’ll get to call your sisters for life. Keep an open mind and trust your gut. All the shenanigans are worth it in the end!
