I, like many people, have spent a good amount of my life searching for answers to things I was never really meant to have the answers to. Sometimes when silence was all I got from someone in a situation, I made it my mission for months to get something, anything else from them to understand why they did what they did when in reality, silence was the clearest answer of them all. It took me years to figure this out.
Whatever aspect of my life it was in, silence was never a good enough answer for me, and it was, in fact, the most hurtful answer of them all. Silence hurts the worst because it leaves you with so many unanswered questions, so many possible things that could have gone wrong, and that person who you thought you knew couldn’t even give you the closure you deserved, realizing just how little they cared. It stings more than anything, but eventually that silence will heal you.
I find the few times that I have been hurt the most in my life my naturally reactive-self resorts to silence. When you’re hurting the worst sometimes the last thing you have the energy to do is to put that hurt into words. Maybe you should consider this from the other point of view, consider the fact that the person who hurt you the most maybe didn’t even have the heart to say why they did it. Sometimes you don’t need the answers you are searching so hard for.
Don’t make it your life’s mission to find out why someone did you wrong. Make it your life’s mission to be so resilient and sure of who you are that you no longer need answers from others for their actions. Be so confident in who you are as a person that you are able to walk away from things that no longer serve you with your head held high. You don’t owe others explanations, and unfortunately they don’t owe you one either. Take that silence as protection from words that would have done more harm than good. Silence is sometimes the best thing that person could have given you because for the most part their words never really held their weight in the first place. Stop searching so hard for words of healing from people who hurt you in the first place. The person who broke you, will never be the one to fix you.
