How Social Media Has Ruined Our Capability To Trust

How Social Media Has Ruined Our Capability To Trust

Trusting someone is a beautifully terrifying thing
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As a generation, we have mastered the art of technology. With our knowledge of technology also comes the obsession we have all grown to have with social media. Social media is meant to be a good thing. It is meant to make staying in touch with people easier and to make it convenient to show your family what you’ve been up to while you’ve been away. But our generation has taken a left turn with it. Suddenly, likes on Instagram and favorites on Twitter have more meaning behind them than the words exchanged in everyday conversations. Relationships are ending left and right because guys and girls are finding excuses all over social media to not “trust” their partner anymore.

Let’s start with Snapchat. The root of many couples’ trust issues stemmed from Snapchat’s "best friends" list. Why do you care who your boyfriend/girlfriend is receiving pictures from? I don’t care if they are the most attractive person on this planet; he is dating you. If you’re really worried about a 10-second picture of a filtered, half-smiled pose is really going to be enough to make your guy leave you, then you may have bigger issues than Snapchat and should probably consider staying single until you are ready to trust in your boyfriend rather trusting in a social media outlet to define your relationship.

Next, Instagram. I once listened to a girl vent to her friend about her boyfriend liking another girl’s picture on Instagram. An action that took maybe half of a second and barely any physical movement caused this girl’s trust in her boyfriend to diminish. Don’t be that girl. Liking a girl’s picture does not translate into your boyfriend being unfaithful. It makes you look crazy for caring so much. Someone had to say it so I will be the one to say caring about the photos your boyfriend is liking or the photos that he is tagged in is just a little absurd.

Lastly, Twitter causes problems because you can see who others are talking to and what tweets are being favorited. People will talk to whoever they want. You, as a girlfriend, do not have the right to say who he can and cannot talk to. So, don’t start subtweeting about him because he tweeted that girl from his math class. Your subtweets will not change anything and I promise everything will be okay if you just let him tweet in peace.

Our source of trust comes from validation rather than just believing in the person we have chosen to love. There is too much room for doubt now and too many ridiculous fears that pop into your head as you start to worry about losing your boyfriend. Ignore the rumors and the girls trying to talk to your boyfriend; they are not your business. He chose to be with you. Trust in that. When you stop caring about what he is doing on social media, you will trust him and better your relationship the same way people did before we could check his best friends and favorites. Trusting someone is a beautifully terrifying thing and it can be scary but if you love the right person for the right reasons, it will be worth it. Trust the person you love and love the person you trust.

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50 One-Liners College Girls Swap With Their Roomies As Much As They Swap Clothes

"What would I do without you guys???"
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1. "Can I wear your shirt out tonight?"

2. "Does my hair look greasy?"

3. "We should probably clean tomorrow..."

4. "What should I caption this??"

5. "Is it bad if I text ____ first??"

6. "Should we order pizza?"

7. *Roommate tells an entire story* "Wait, what?"

8. "How is it already 3 AM?"

9. "I need a drink."

10. "McDonalds? McDonalds."

11. "GUESS WHAT JUST HAPPENED."

12. "Okay like, for real, I need to study."

13. "Why is there so much hair on our floor?"

14. "I think I'm broke."

15. "What do I respond to this?"

16. "Let's have a movie night."

17. "Why are we so weird?"

18. "Do you think people will notice if I wear this 2 days in a row?"

19. "That guy is so stupid."

20. "Do I look fat in this?"

21. "Can I borrow your phone charger?

22. "Wanna go to the lib tonight?"

23. "OK, we really need to go to the gym soon."

24. "I kinda want some taco bell."

25. "Let's go out tonight."

26. "I wonder what other people on this floor think of us."

27. "Let's go to the mall."

28. "Can I use your straightener?"

29. "I need coffee."

30. "I'm bored, come back to the room."

31. "Should we go home this weekend?"

32. "We should probably do laundry soon."

33. "Can you see through these pants?"

34. "Sometimes I feel like our room is a frat house..."

35. "Guys I swear I don't like him anymore."

36."Can I borrow a pencil?"

37. "I need to get my life together...."

38. "So who's buying the Uber tonight?"

39. "Let's walk to class together."

40. "Are we really pulling an all-nighter tonight?"

41. "Who's taking out the trash?"

42. "What happened last night?"

43. "Can you help me do my hair?"

44. "What should I wear tonight?"

45. "You're not allowed to talk to him tonight."

46. "OMG, my phone is at 1 percent."

47. "Should we skip class?"

48. "What should we be for Halloween?"

49. "I love our room."

50. "What would I do without you guys???"

Cover Image Credit: Hannah Gabaldon

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Living The College Life Doesn't Mean You Can Judge Those Who Chose Something Different

Life is full of choices and we can only judge our own.

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Picture this: you just got home from your summer internship and as you're sitting on the couch catching up on all of your social media for the day, you see that another girl you went to high school with is pregnant with her second kid! You may have only tangentially known this girl, but you immediately screenshot the post and send it to your group chat of your friends from home.

The conversation probably looks something like this:

You: (insert girl's name here) is pregnant!! Again!

Friend A: Whatt?!? Dude. I didn't even know she had a kid before.

Friend B: I just saw this too! Crazy!! I can barely keep my cactus alive, so kids definitely won't be on my radar anytime soon.

Friend A: Relatable. I honestly can't imagine.

Sound familiar?

So many of us do this, and even if not with malicious intent, we often don't realize that what may come as shocking or irresponsible in our eyes may be a perfectly normal and responsible life choice for someone else. Most of us are in college and are surrounded by, you guessed it — people that are also in college. This may be the path that the majority of us are on, but it is not the path that everyone takes, and we should be able to respect that.

Just because you are working towards becoming an engineer, doctor or lawyer doesn't mean that you are better than the person who chose to enter the workforce after high school or the person who chose to start a family early.

If you think about all the different choices and circumstances that landed you where you are today, you'll begin to realize how many different paths you could've taken. Hopefully you can look back and be happy with the path you chose, but more importantly, you should be able to notice that the choices you made to get there may not have been the choices that would have been best for a different person in different circumstances.

So, is it okay to send that screenshot to your friends back home? Sure! It's always fun to keep track of what people from your high school are up to and to reminisce with your old friends. We just need to be careful not to judge those who are on different paths, no matter how much they differ from our own.

Life is full of choices, and, at the end of the day, the only choices we can judge are our own. You often don't know the entire story when it's someone you know, much less when it's just some girl you went to high school with.

Cover Image Credit:

Darby Peter

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