Congratulations! And welcome to the club. We may not all wear matching cardigans, but eventually, you’ll be able to spot your fellow English major from a mile away – we usually exhibit several of the following behaviors: reading while walking, writing with pen in hand while having backup pen behind ear, carrying around coffee mug, sitting in the library for abnormally long amounts of time (we kind of like it in there), and many more. We all have our one-of-a-kind quirks. But we’re here for you. You may be teased for your bookworm-ish mannerisms, you may be judged for getting excited about that midterm paper, and your major will definitely be (oh so wrongly) accused of being useless. But fear not! ‘Tis not true! There are a few things to remember, though, as you dive into this - lest you retreat into the local bookery, never to be seen or heard from again…

1. You will have to learn to refrain from violence when asked the question, “Sooooo, you want to teach??”

It will happen. Probably more than once. Maybe you do want to teach - that’s wonderful! But maybe you’re like many of us who want to be writers, or editors, or journalists. Or you just like reading and don’t know what you want to do at all – we’ve been there too. In which case, try to be understanding. They know not what they do.

2. Your friends will worry that you are silently judging their grammar.

And you are, a little. Try not to let those pesky apostrophes and homonyms get to you. Some people don’t have your way with words, and maybe you don’t have a way with them 100 percent of the time, yourself. That’s okay. We’re only human (unless you’re J.K. Rowling), and that means there’s room for error, on your part and theirs. You will have to learn to live with the grammar mistakes you encounter, for there are many to be made.

3. You have signed up to read about writing and write about reading for the remainder of your college career.

But it’s not as bad as it sounds. There will be a time when your professor turns to you with a look in their eye as bitterly cold as a Midwest winter and tells you to finish that novel by Friday, and you will panic. But you can do it! There’s no need to question your major (not that we all haven’t done that a million times). Remember: you declared this because you love it. This is what you’re good at. You’ve got this! The tough coursework can seem impossible to get through, but in the end, it’ll be the things you love about your courses that you remember. So here’s hoping you’ve got some good professors.

4. Some assignments are basically exiled from all social activity.

Refer again to the above paragraph for further detail *pause for your reference*. Like most university students, you will, from time to time, be assigned inconceivable amounts of writing. But now that you’re an English major, there will be a semester or two (or three or four) where most (if not all) of your classes are - you guessed it – writing intensive! It will take days to finish that essay you’ve been dreading, and when you finally finish, you’ll realize you have one from another class due the next day. It might take you all night to finish that one too. You might feel like you’re missing out on adventures. But don’t worry; you’re on an adventure of your own! It will all one day work to your advantage: you’ll have all the best spots in the library scouted out, and you’ll always have an excuse when you’re not in the “going-out” mood. A good friend won’t argue with a ten-pager. And if they’re a keeper, they won’t even argue with a three-pager. You’ll never have to be the designated driver again!

5. Inspiration will strike in dire straits.

It will be 2 a.m. on a Tuesday night, and you’ll be staring at your computer screen/notebook with nothing but a paragraph written out, and absolutely no direction from there. You will be tired and nearly out of coffee -a.k.a. on the brink of total breakdown. Things will seem entirely hopeless, and you will be preparing the best excuse for late work you can muster (“The stray cat broke in and took my homework.”/ “My mom lost her glasses again and I had to fly home to help her find them.”/ “I’m lactose intolerant.”/etc.) when it’ll hit you like a bat on a baseball. Sometimes it’s just when you’re about to give up that you figure it all out. So, to be frank, don’t give up! Take a break if you have to. But don’t give up on your writing.

6. Your future will now be cause for concern in your friend and family circles.

So many of the people you love and care about will insert their unwelcome noses into the prospects of success in your prospective professional life. They will worry that writing won’t guarantee you comfort and happiness (cough cough, money). In fact, you will also worry about these things now and again. You’ll wonder what your other options could have been. But then you’ll realize that being literate (thank you, English major) opens all kinds of doors for you. From an undergraduate degree in English, you could continue your studies in nearly any setting. Your writing will be a gift wherever you choose to share it.

Though there are a thousand more things to say, you know now that the future you’ve chosen is not as scary as it seems. From one English major to another, besides all the finger aches and eye strains (that typing will get to you), there’s a lot to look forward to. You will meet some of the most interesting and wonderful people in the professors you get to know through your studies, and sharing the work you take pride in with them will be more meaningful than you know. You’ll find that finishing a well thought-out piece and handing in the final product can be one of the very best feelings. Even though you are sure to have off days, you will put your heart and soul into a lot of what you write, and that will make it all so worth it. All this and more awaits you, young grasshoppers. But you’ll see that soon enough.