Let's talk about the issue of female sexuality.
First off, let's touch on derogatory statements about women's sexual choices. Why is it that when a girl is sexually active and owns it, she is deemed slutty? Then, in the same situation, if a girl is not "DTF" because she is waiting, she is suddenly a prude? And God forbid a woman wants to meet halfway. Then she's an array of interesting titles. No one ever seems to criticize male sexuality, that is until it's illegal, or until he surprises everyone by not wanting to have sex. Double standard much?
More specifically, let's talk about virginity. Let's talk about how I've been told by friends that I'm "not a typical virgin," and that boys have looked at me and blatantly not believed me when I told them I was a virgin. What exactly makes someone assume whether or not you've had sex? Why is it that a woman's virginity is associated with whether or not she goes to church, or curses, or drinks? Is it not determined by one moment of time within her entire life?
What exactly is it about me that states I'm not a virgin? Possibly my use of profanity, or my sassy and flirtatious attitude, or my comfort level with dirty jokes. It's true that I might be crude at times, and that I may fit in better at a Kesha concert than a church cookout. But it's also true that not every woman that fits the "virgin" stereotype are still virgins themselves. What do specific details say about what life experiences someone has had? Am I supposed to introduce myself with it? No. No one is going to walk around campus with the word "virgin" on their forehead.
But here's where I stand: why does anyone care? A person's private life is exactly that. Private. People are not required to share with the world every time they kiss someone new, or go to second base, or have sex with someone. The only time it should be anyone else's concern is if you are about to engage in sexual activity with that person and want to know for your own health, or if you are their nurse or doctor.
The whole issue, in a nutshell, is an assumption. People are constantly assuming they know things about their friends and acquaintances. People always assume that the rumor they heard was true. They assume that since someone is educated about sexual health than they must be experienced. But the reality is that you never know anything for sure until you ask the source directly. And even then, the source has every right to tell you to screw off and mind your own damn business.
The whole issue in a nutshell is assumption.
