September is basically the month of the year that trudges on for what seems like decades. Okay, that might be a bombastic statement, but you get the idea.
September has no excitement to it whatsoever. There’s Labor Day, but that’s pretty much it. Worse yet, there’s three months that succeed it that each have exciting holidays. September is the month that just tests your ever-decreasing patience. It’s like that conversation that your mom becomes involved in when she sees a friend at the store. It just continues on and on and on until you’re left wondering if the plastic bins your mother was just looking at are edible; because you know, you’ll be stuck there for a couple of days. And right when it seems to be over, your mother’s friend brings up some vague name of a person they may or may have not been friends with in high school. Oh no! A car crash? How terrible! But hurry up September; no one cares.
School also starts in September (well, for some college kids). As for high schoolers (and some state schools) school has already begun. It’s their first real month of school. Which is just ... terrific. The homework starts to pile on, and all of a sudden those poor kids in the AP classes have their first couple of tests and projects due. September has nothing to offer those kids in school besides being just a long shot of school. Yes, yes, October has school for a straight month too. But the hype of Halloween distracts from the pressure of school. Speaking of which, September is also the month big stores launch Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas merchandise. So September, make up your mind about which holiday you are actually prepping us for.
But let us not overlook fall. Fall starts in September, normally about halfway through. And fall is an amazing season ... except for when it’s in September. Because guess what? September can’t make up its damn mind about the weather too: Oh, it was cold yesterday, so it must be ... nope! It’s going to be 90 degrees out the next day. First day of fall windy and seasonally appropriate? Well it’s about time ... nope! It’s going to be hot all next week. Swimming weather! Oh wait, you’re in school. So stepping outside in September is a gamble. Should you wear a sweater and be comfortable when a nippy breeze brushes by? Or are you going to be rammed up the butt with the sun’s rays and nearly die from heatstroke? No one knows, except for the people dying outside.
And that is why September is the worst month.
