“You must really like grammar, or something,” a guy once said to me when he saw the semicolon on my wrist. I looked at him and said, “Actually, grammar is my worst subject.”
I’m sure some, if not all, of you have come across someone with a semicolon tattoo on their wrist, their finger, the back of their neck, or anywhere else on their body.
The mission statement for Project Semicolon is as follows: “Project Semicolon is a global non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and love for those who are struggling with mental illness, suicide, addiction, and self-injury. Project Semicolon exists to encourage, love and inspire. Stay strong; love endlessly; change lives. “
“This project began in the spring of 2013, when Project Semicolon Founder, Amy Bleuel wanted to honor her father whom she lost to suicide. Through the semicolon symbol many related to the struggle of depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide and their will to continue on. The title, ‘Project Semicolon,’ also represented a goal – to believe that this is not the end but a new beginning.
Over the years Project Semicolon has become much more than just one person honoring a parent. Through musician support and social media, the message of hope and love has reached a big audience in many different countries.
Project Semicolon is honored to be a part of those continuing stories and to be an inspiration to those who are struggling” (projectsemicolon.org).
I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety for the majority of my life but was only recently diagnosed in 2013. I’ve attempted suicide once when I was 14 and I’ve contemplated it a few times since then. For the longest time, I felt like I was the only one who suffered from these mental illnesses. For the longest time, I felt so alone.
I finally started going to therapy and taking anxiety medication when I was 19. My therapist made a huge impact on my life and I am forever grateful that she helped me to find myself again. She brought me back up from my lowest points and helped me realize that I am here for a reason. I am here to change lives and to make others happy.
I had contemplated getting a semicolon tattoo for years, but never felt like any time was the appropriate time. I had researched it, learned the meaning behind the tattoo, and found that people drew a semicolon on their wrist on April 16th to show their support to the cause. I decided to do the same. I never knew when I would actually get the tattoo, however it was something I kept in the back of my head.
During winter break last year, I found myself in a deep, deep rut. I was defeated. I was unhappy. I was miserable. I felt like all I had been working for stopped and that I didn’t have a purpose anymore. I found myself questioning everything in my life. Things only got worse when January 8th came, which is the anniversary of my nana’s death. This day hits me hard every single year. My nana has been gone a very long time, but the day never gets easier. That day, I had scheduled an appointment at a tattoo shop down the street from my house. I was scheduled for a consult. When the artist found out that I simply wanted a semicolon on my wrist, he said “OK. Let’s hop in the chair and do it now.” That’s when it set in—this is real.
The tattoo took about 60 seconds to complete. Once it was done, I couldn’t help but smile. Something I had thought about for years was finally a reality. And I had gotten the tattoo on a day that brings me so much pain and sadness. I knew that my nana would be proud of me for overcoming so much and for now giving this day a new meaning – a meaning of hope.
Whenever I feel low or feel like giving up, I catch a glimpse of my wrist and realize that I am strong. I can overcome my mental illnesses. I can change the stigma. This tattoo is a constant reminder of all I have overcome and all that I am working to persevere through every day.
For a long time, it was difficult for me to open up about my depression and my anxiety. I wanted to share my story with those that are close to me but I didn’t know how. Mental illness is not something that is easy to talk about.
Since I have gotten this tattoo, I’ve been able to speak more about what myself and many others endure on a daily basis. My tattoo is a conversation starter. People see it and ask what it means. My self-defense teacher had asked me what the tattoo meant a few weeks ago. Once I had told him, he looked at me, smiled, gave me a fist bump, and said “Keep going, kid.”
Keep going. Your story isn’t over.
