So when I first started college, I thought I was going to be dating my future husband by the time I was a junior...
Boy how shit changes.
Here I am, a junior and single.
You see, when I broke up with my last boyfriend I told myself the following year was going to be dedicated to me. This was in 2017 and now in 2019, I'm proud to say I am still dedicated to me.
Many people feel bad for single people but the relationship you have with yourself is the most influential relationship in your entire life.
I never realized that in high school. I bounced from boyfriend to boyfriend wondering why none of them worked. Then, I realized that instead of trying to invest this time and effort in other people, I needed to invest it in myself.
So there, I did it.
I said 2017 was the year of me. A year later, proud of being single and focused on myself for so long, I decided to do it for another year. During this journey to self-love, I have met a guy or two along the way but none of them were along their self-love journey as well. From then on, I decided to not date in college.
I have dedicated my college years to me, and, damn, it feels great looking back and knowing my memories are me with friends, not some boy who broke my heart. I reflect on all the things I did, not anyone else. I learned to love myself.
Loving yourself is so key when it comes to future relationships. Your past relationships are like mirrors of your relationship with yourself.
Your relationship with yourself affects everything in how you treat your partner and other people. I never realized that until sitting down and reflecting. Think about it in terms of how you feel on a given day. Most people have their personalities affected by their confidence and their relationship with themselves. I know for me personally, on days when I would feel insecure about myself, there would be negatives or something else that would ruin my day and I would fixate on it. Yet on the days when I felt confident, the days would be good and I would be happy and carefree.
The more you love yourself, the more good days will come.
One day when I'm graduated, I know I will end up with the right person because I spent so much time investing in and discovering myself that I will be ready to grow with someone else.
How else could you accept someone in your life without discovering and loving yourself? You have to love yourself to love someone else.
I think this is why so many marriages don't work out. You have no idea who you are without this person and that's so unhealthy. A relationship is not you being reliant on someone else to know who you are. YOU have to know who you are before a relationship.
Dedicate your college years to you.
Follow Swoon on Instagram.