They say that those who fall under the umbrella of a Taurus in zodiac signs are very stubborn and don't like change. I can say that I am one of those people. I was raised in Los Angeles but my family moved around a lot. I've lived in Mississippi for a number of years, but I've also lived in Atlanta for a few years. I can honestly say that I'm grateful for having moved quite a bit because it has made me the social butterfly that I am now. Although I feel like that has played a key role in who I am, I never got used to saying goodbye to friends. I know so many people who have friends from their childhood, and I've always been envious of that. It's safe to say I hate losing friends, for whatever reason. Just as the season change, so do people and I've had to learn the hard way that not everyone is meant to stay in your life for a long time.
Coming into college, I met a friend at freshman orientation I had remained in contact with over the summer, let's call him Will. He and I became really close because we were both music majors. We went through a lot during our freshman year and became like brothers. My actual brother is 12 years older than I am, so there's a huge difference in who we are as people. It was nice to have a friend who I really related to in a brotherly way who was closer to my age. Will and I partied together, prayed together, worked together and things were great. I was very lucky to have had a close friend to go through the struggles of being freshman music major. Will and I remained fairly close for another year or so but there came a time when things changed. I didn't realize it at the time, but we were growing up and becoming different people. Will got a girlfriend and I was still, of course, hopelessly single. Our schedules were conflicting and gradually our friend groups were changing fairly quickly and I really didn't know how to deal. I think I'm a perceptive person so I noticed when we began to drift apart. I wanted to bring it to Will's attention to try to remedy the situation, but friendship is a two-way street, you know?
Long story short, I tried on more than one occasion to talk to Will and try and fix our dwindling friendship, but I was useless. It's kind of hard to fix a problem that the other person doesn't recognize. Time had passed and we were juniors and we rarely talked. It really bothered me because he began to socialize with "my friends," so naturally I hated that. I was selfish and felt like if our friendship had dissipated then he shouldn't be growing so close to people who I held dear to me. In retrospect, I wish I had the ability to let go. I've always cared about my friends so losing one of them made me feel like a failure, like I was the reason why things weren't working out. I've come to learn that people aren't meant to stay in our lives always. As much as we want them to stay, sometimes it doesn't work anymore and that's okay.
We still speak every now and again, but we aren't nearly as tight as we used to be and I've accepted that. People are going to always come in and our of our lives and that's something we must understand. I hate using this cliché but it holds true; some people are in our life for a season or a lifetime. They're in our lives to teach some lesson and share life experiences to get us to the next leg of our journey in life. We can't move on and hold on to the people who don't want to or better yet, aren't meant to be in our future. Holding on to people when we need to be letting go is terrible for both parties. I now enjoy my friends knowing that my time with them isn't forever. Seasons change and so do we. I encourage everyone to begin this new season of the year embracing change. Leaves will wither away, and the breeze will blow colder, but don't be afraid to accept the changes that life has to offer. When we harp and hold on to the past or what was, can we ever move forward and love the life we live. Embrace the seasons because although some things pass away, there are many more memories to be shared and experiences to be had with new faces.
