I Was Scared To Love, I Was Scared To Live
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I Was Scared To Love, I Was Scared To Live

The fear of dying consumed me to the point where I stopped living.

I Was Scared To Love, I Was Scared To Live

I am going, to be frank in saying, I'm scared.

I've dealt with so much pain and loss, that I'm petrified of losing anyone else that I love.

I want to put everyone in my life in a bubble so that no one could get hurt.

I heard that something was wrong. I felt it the night before, there was a pit in my stomach. I just knew.

Now that I know, I'm still left with the unknown. I don't know what will happen, no one does. None of this adds up.

How does someone go from being perfectly OK, to suddenly not?

I'm going to worry until I know you're OK. But I'm scared that'll never come.

I can't help but think the worst, how can one be optimistic when they've been surrounded with examples of failed hope.

I'm genuinely OK, I've accepted that things will be how things will be, but still, this sucks.

I am going to mentally prepare myself for what may or may not happen.

Who knows? Maybe everything will be fine. Maybe the sun will shine, and you'll be fixed.

The human body is such a complex thing, it has a time clock and it ticks away.

I'm waiting for the day when people stop dying. I think that everyone wishes we were invincible, or at least I do.

I wish that I wasn't so scared, I wish I could let people get close to me, but how can I when everyone I loved has been ripped away from me. It's hard to let yourself embrace the beauty of life when you're so scared of death.

I've faced the music, however, if I keep living in fear, then I'm not truly living. When you lose someone, the world doesn't stop moving. Your world might, but in the grand scheme of things, nothing changes.

Life is a messy, sad, beautiful thing. I'm starting to realize the circle of life, and that I can't live in fear. People come and people go. Everything in this world is temporary.

Live your life for today, don't let fear consume you like it did to me. Let those you love get close to you, and make your time with them as special as you can, because unfortunately, we can never repeat a day. There will never be this day again. We only get older in life. Hug those close to you, tell them you love them, and learn to love and appreciate this scary thing called life.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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