Imagine a wedding where everything goes wrong. Half the guests walk out, the best man craps on the couple in his speech, and the maid of honor's toast sounds strangely familiar to a scene in "Bridesmaids." If you tuned into the Republican National Convention last week, then it will not require much imagination.
Watching CNN during the convention was like watching a four day, slow motion train wreck. Donald Trump promised an "amazing" event, full of entertainment and spectacle. What we got instead was a lackluster and, at best, inconsistent convention which did little to hide the growing fractiousness within the party of Trump.
On the first day, there was a humiliating show of disunity on the floor of the convention, when delegates from the #NeverTrump effort tried to force a roll call vote on party rules. Hoping to pass a rule to "unbind" delegates from voting for the candidate chosen by their state primary or caucus, a majority of delegates from 11states presented their signatures to force a vote. Rep. Steve Womack from Arkansas, who was presiding over the convention, decided that instead of a roll call vote, the delegation would have a voice vote. A roll call vote, in which representatives from each state's delegations announce their attendance and tally their votes, would have been more of a public spectacle and given delegates a chance to publicly voice their opposition. Hundreds of delegates then began to chant "roll-call vote" in an effort to pressure Womack into using the more traditional voting method. Womack left the stage and the convention Secretary (to whom signatures to force a roll call vote had to be submitted) actually fled into hiding. As the convention floor descended into chaos, with different factions chanting against one another, the entire Colorado delegation withdrew.
It was an embarrassing start, but the day only worsened. A series of D-list celebrities took the stage, like Chachi Arcola from "Happy Days" and Willie Robertson from "Duck Dynasty," seemingly in an effort to make viewers fall asleep. Those that did doze off, must have been rudely woken by the voice of Rudy Giuliani, former mayor of New York City, yelling over a chant of "USA." He delivered an angry speech on radical Islamic terrorism with the conviction and passion of an elderly man telling kids to get off his lawn.
Then (finally) the main event arrived. After a dramatic entrance onto a stage covered with fog, Donald Trump introduced his wife, Melania, who wrapped up Monday's events with a plagiarized speech. Rather than reporting on Trump's exciting appearance, the media was investigating damning allegations that portions of Melania's speech had been lifted from Michelle Obama's 2008 speech at the Democratic National Convention. It would not have been so bad, if the Trump campaign had simply said, "Sorry, it was a speechwriter and it won't happen again." Instead they refused to admit that the incident had occurred in the first place, and accused Hillary of manufacturing the whole issue. One Trump spokesperson went as far as to claim that, "This concept that Michelle Obama invented the English language is absurd."
On Tuesday, Donald Trump was officially nominated in a standard (and most importantly, uneventful) roll call vote. The procedure was followed by a rather cringeworthy speech from Chris Christie, the governor of New Jersey who had just been snubbed for the position of Vice President. Asking the crowd whether they thought Hillary was "guilty or not guilty" the delegates began to chant, "Lock her up!" Surprisingly well delivered speeches from Trump's children were overshadowed by the growing media storm over the RNC delegate and casual white supremacist who tweeted various racial obscenities, the Trump adviser who claimed that Clinton should be put on a firing line and executed, and the Iowa representative who asked whether non-whites had ever made contributions to Western civilization.
The Republicans did not fair much better on Wednesday night, either. A video from Marco Rubio, a speech by Scott Walker and even the speech from the vice presidential nominee, Mike Pence, were completely overshadowed by a stunning speech from Ted Cruz. Talking instead about conservative ideals, Cruz told Republicans to "vote their conscience" up and down the ballot, refusing to endorse Trump. His final words were almost made inaudible by boos and chants of "Keep your pledge!" from the crowd. He left the stage with a wave to Donald Trump, who stood in the back, watching his convention play out, not unlike a reality TV show.
The next morning, Cruz remarked that he was "not in the habit of supporting someone who attacks my wife and attacks my father.” Trump, earlier in the campaign, had insinuated that Cruz's wife was ugly and that his father had been involved in the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. Shockingly, Cruz had taken it personally.
All of Thursday's speeches were but an appetizer for the main course. Trump's much anticipated speech went over like one of his steaks. Speaking from a script, rather than shooting from the hip, Trump promised to restore order to the country "very soon" and declared that, “As your President, I will do everything in my power to protect our LGBT citizens from the violence and oppression of a hateful foreign ideology -- believe me.”
As the convention came to a close on Thursday night, one thing was clear: The Republicans have not learned the lessons from their losses in 2008 and 2012. The convention was a total disaster; on every count, the Republicans failed to craft a message that would appeal to anyone not already a Trump supporter. The Log Cabin Republicans look unlikely to endorse Trump as a result of the blatant homophobia in the GOP platform. Immigrants and Latinos were given very little reason to vote for the man who called Mexicans drug dealers and rapists. Only 17 women showed up to the "Woman for Trump" rally at the RNC. Ted Cruz even gave conservative Republicans more reason not to vote for their party's nominee.
If conventions are like weddings between a candidate and their party, then the RNC was a botched, arranged marriage. Almost everything that could have gone wrong, did go wrong. Bill Clinton once said, "In every presidential election, Democrats want to fall in love. Republicans just fall in line.” The opposite seems to be true today. We can likely expect a better convention, a more unified party and a more consistent, optimistic message from Democrats in Philadelphia.